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My Past Weekend

So... as some of you know I headed down to VA beach to chill with Ben which was AMAZING! althoughh noooowww our marriage secret has been leaked since my mother was down there too, in a separate room of coarse =] but we all went out to applebees and we were plannning on telling her there but we kinda both chickened out... so we went back to her room with her and my 3 year old brother annnndd of coarse haha father of the bride happened to be on when i turned on the tv, so i left it there just as like hmmmm maybe this will help bring up the topic, but eventually Ben just got up the guts and said "welll madre,,, we have something to ask you and kinda hope to hear what you think of what im about to say... Lauren and I are thinking of getting married!!" wellll after about 5 minutes into the convo it was really strange, she jumped right to the idea of children!!! which by the way Ben and I were talkin about that part and I layed it flat out that hes gunna have to wait on that part for at least 4 more years and i have my degree and have a job for myself going, and he agreed that he didnt even wanna concider it til he was a little more financially stable like at least a corpral. but we did consider a dog for us in the future but that has nothing to do with this mommy marriage story haha... so after chilling her on the children topic she eventually said that she would fully support an engagement for a year first and wait til next summer to get married.

so while Ben was taking a nap before we planned on going out bowling i couldnt even think of napping next to him cause i had so much on my mind sooooo being the loser that i am and allllll the practice i have writting letters haha i sat down and wrote a letter to him to straighten out my thoughts, and what i came up with was that my mother doesnt see how seriously we have taken into consideration everything especially my schooling which would be the main concern of my mom's. she only sees us as the crazy kids that chill around the house watchin movies eating pizza and writting love letters , so i came to the conclusion that our plan to get legally married around christmas when he comes home is the best plan. so i can continue the spring semester here at home then have a smallish beach ceremony in may and i will hopefully move out and in with Ben by then depending on when he is going  to be deployed since im not going to move alllllllll  alone and only have him there for a month and then be allllllll alone for 7 monthss to a year!!

soooo basically i need a little advice on how to convince my mother on how seriously we have taken this decision =] and also maybe some advice on how to tell my dad alll by myself most likely tomorro night =/  the most advice i got was from ben in that if i go into the convo very happy and all chipper there is less of a chance that my family will want to crush my dreams of marrying the man of my dreams but if i dont have confidnce in our decision than they will see im not set in my choice and try there hardest to change my mind!!!

so ladies HELLLPPPP!!!!

much love,

Lauren

hereforhim323 hereforhim323 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 26, 2008

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aw im happy you got to see him first off thats sooo exciting i bet it was the best feeling ever! i think you need to do what you think is right for you guys relationship and people will understand that, your mom sounds like she was supportive and it went well telling her so just show that your two are serious and this is really what you want. message me and let me know how it all goes :)

first, remind yourself that youre doing what makes you so incredibly happy! then, just like he said, go in there with confidence, with your mind made up. If they see that you are happy, and talking calmy and rationally, and that you and he have considered all of the angles, then they should be supportive. You're their little girl and they're going to want to protect you, so show that youre the adult you are and have a mature adult conversation with them. Keep the fear that might be running through you locked inside, because if they see that they might pounce on it. Its awesome that your mom is supportive though!! good luck and keep us posted! and of course, your sisters are always here for you!