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Well Ladiesss

its officially one week down of this deployment for us and though it seemed to drag on and linger i think things are looking up from here

i went and mailed my first 2 letters yesterday and am almost done with my first box to send out. i havent heard from him yet to just say he got there but thats okay. as much as id love to hear form him right about now. i think its better for both of us right now to not do that. i think it will hinder my adjusting to him being gone again. i know that sounds bad but i just know how i feel when hes gone. its like i need to flip a switch in order to handle him being gone. if he was to call me now i know imma be all i miss you i miss you and that makes it worse on him and i get all sad alllll over again. so for us this works, i know for sure it makes it easier on him to adjust then manage to write me a letter or call once he has his war bearings back. i know that no news is good news. i know that if i dont get a phone call from his father or a call from his friend adam hes fine. and that makes me feel better. but soon id like to get a letter or a email or maybe a call to hear him say hes fine and well be fine. 

 

anywho i went to 29 palms this week and got chris car. it was bittersweet bc now i have his car and alllllll his posessions meaning i get to look and hold and touch them whenever i feel the need and then it makes me sad bc everytime his car was at my house it ment i was going to get to spend me weekend with him and i was going to be unexplainably happy...but being in the car without him makes me sad. we used to explore everwhere around here [[bc i just moved idk where anything is hahah]] and just be out dong nothing all day haha...so ya :/

 

but other than that im doing good you know just chilling trying to find a job! 

 

CnC2509 CnC2509 18-21, F 15 Responses Oct 18, 2009

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Okay so I am totally going to try and steal in on this convo haha!! my bf deployed 3 weeks ago and for the most part i have been okay but then i have these moments that i seriously think about it and i realize that i have like 10 more months without my baabby boy and it kills me!! its like overwhelming. my bf is in iraq and for a while i was getting to talk to him on the computer almost every day and then now i havent heard from him at all in a week...i guess i thought i just got really lucky and that we wwere going to get to communicate on a regular basis. This is only my first deployment sooo i am pretty clueless on how he could go from talking to me everyday to not hearing from him in a week! haha i need some advice and support and my friends just dont get it-- they complain about not seeing their boyfriend for one night.

Okay so I am totally going to try and steal in on this convo haha!! my bf deployed 3 weeks ago and for the most part i have been okay but then i have these moments that i seriously think about it and i realize that i have like 10 more months without my baabby boy and it kills me!! its like overwhelming. my bf is in iraq and for a while i was getting to talk to him on the computer almost every day and then now i havent heard from him at all in a week...i guess i thought i just got really lucky and that we wwere going to get to communicate on a regular basis. This is only my first deployment sooo i am pretty clueless on how he could go from talking to me everyday to not hearing from him in a week! haha i need some advice and support and my friends just dont get it-- they complain about not seeing their boyfriend for one night.

awww right arm!!! i love you! hahaha your right i couldnt get very far without you lol...and im sure time is going to fly now... :)



alexandria, i DO miss him right now and im sure ill have my patches where i reak down but i mean i am handling this better than last time for sure..hahaha i wear his shirts to sleep n and spay it with his cologne and im a happy camper!! hahaha plus i know the busier i try and be [[which right now isnt really working out bc i dont have a job but im really looking hard]] but the busie i am and the more i stay busy and just not focus on the fact that he isnt here and look foreward to maybe having him home NEXT thanksgiving make me a positive person!! hahaha :):)



hahaha yeah sorry hun i did change my pic it had been awhile since i did that lol like a few months...hahaha exactly put a smile on and move on to next week...thats all you can do :) i know from last time if i let myself be sad its a very slippery downhill road.

you changed your pic, you confused me! lol

but hey, it sounds as if you're about to find a good way in dealing with the situation! I'm glad you're doing okay. Trust me, it's been 3 days now since I'm back in germany, i get what you are talking about! :)



chin up, and let's go next week ;)

I can't even imagine what you're going through..



I'm looking forward to when you're in the stage where you miss him, but you're busy and realizing it's not so bad.. because my heart really goes out to you right now.



It looks as though you're doing a lot better than you thought you would be, and that's just awesome..



Keep it up. I'm glad you didn't decide to cut us all off like you thought you were going to need to do :o)



You're doing great!

yeah i know what you mean....chris is missing halloween,thanksgiving,christmas,new years, our one year anni, valentines day, my birthday, his bday [[hell be 21 too :(]] easter, st patricks, fourth of july, halloween again and im praying really really hard it wont be another thanksgiving too...but yeah :):) idc how many holidays it takes as long as he comes home to me in one piece and with a hug and a kiss!! hahaha :):)

yeppp im stoked. i mean hes missing halloween, thanksgiving, christmas, new years, valentines day. he miss our 2 year. and both of our birthdays. yep id say he missed the better half of the year. but ohhh well as long as he comes home TO ME. idc how long i have to wait. :)

awwww thats sooo cute you send one every other week...thats a lot of boxes!! ahahaha and i really think its col that you are close to his family! i wish i could go see chris family but his mom doesnt know me that well and his dad who is dying to meet me is in VA :( but you are deff right about this going fast! i know soon imma be like yay for RR haahah and then yay for homecoming!

yep.... i actually was thinkin about it and today was 10 weeks that hes been gone. its insane. i mean like actually keep up with the days and i remember when i was puttin day6 or 8 ya know now im putting 71... now i just hve to get to like 180. lol its gone quick tho. and keeping up with his family makes it easier. i try to visit once a week. it does get hard tho bc the closest one in his family is 2 hours away lol but when i do i get his nephews to draw pictures and whatnot and i send it lol and his mom and sisters write letters and i send like one big package with everyones letters and drawings every week. and i try to send a carepackage every other week (one every pay check lol )

hahaha im hoping he will be home for your bday too!!!



and im crossing my fingers it doesnt stop either...and honestly when i think about ti this past year went soooooo fast...i mean this time last year chris was deployed in iraq. and i was still in highschool!! hahaha i hope it goes jsut as fast this time!! ahaha im ready for it to be nov. 2010!! ahaha lmao!!

Yea i cant even believe im already 2 months down...sucks that another one got added on but there's not much I can do about it. My bday is the 28th so maybe just MAYBE he will be home.



Think about how fast this past year went...CRAZY! So I'm crossing fingers for all of us that time doesnt decide to just stop or something ridiculous lol

hahaha thanks lauren!! and i know i have a feelign tis going to fly by and hell be home b4 i know it! haha or im hoping :)

Awh the first week is pretty hard but now its over and it will get a move on! You've got this.

hahah i know i knew i just needed to get thru this week...hahaha i kinda know what to expect with my feelings from last deployment and i know what makes him absolutely crazyyy so i strayed from writing i miss you thousands of times and just wrote him like he were here and i was talking to him..hahaha and i wrote my first motomail...hasnt been sent yet but i wrote it hahaha!! and i deff am hoping for a job soon!! i been job hunting for ever!! geeze i just needa break ahahah

yesss ma'am.. the 1st week is the hardest. i dont think i slept more than 8 hours that week. and i wrote a million letters. I wrote all the "i miss you sooo much letters and idk how im gonna do this without you. it hurts so much" letters and just didnt send them. to me its my way to vent lol with out actually makin it harder for him. and after that was out of my system i would write him the "i miss you but im ok and everythings good" letters haha. and the job makes it easier. for me its 12 hours a day that im too busy to cry lol