Hi Ladies! I Need Your Imput!

thanks. and you girls really do give me a lot of hope. you have so many wonderful things to say that really have and do help me =]

thanks. and thats amazing about your first date with Alex. =] i look up to you. your an amazing person. i hate empty promises and thats all Tristian ever had to offer me. but i am greatful to him because he did teach me what i want and DONT want in a relationship. with this new guy i layed it all out on the line in the beginning. i figured no need wasting my time if he didnt know what i wouldnt put up with and if we had different ideas for a life lol

you just made me laugh. yeah i know i really had no idea what was next, i guess my biggest problem was i believed everything he told me. which made it seem like everything was set in stone. though looking back now i wonder how much he really was even serious about. i cant say i miss our realationship. if anything i miss the friendship we had before and during. and i miss the person i thought he was!

I know there is better out there dont get me wrong i do. i cant explain it. its weird. i mean Tristian never really treated me right. and i knew at the time that what he was doing was not how i should be treated. but i loved the idea of it all. and thats what i think it is still. i love the idea of marrying Tristian and having a wonderful house and family and living happily ever after. even though i know it wouldnt be like that. i just miss the stability of knowing what was next in my life. and now i dont have a clue.

thanks im really trying too.



and thats what kills me the most i dont want to see him get hurt or anything. i dont want him to throw away his life. i mean ill always love and care about him. i just wish i could help. but i know i cant. i know i have to let go. i just wish it was easier.

I feel ya girl. my ex and I dated for almost 3 years. I loved him, he loved me. We were young, but even still looking back I know it was love. Eventually he started to cheat on me, and lie about smoking pot. I always forgave him because he had a rocky childhood and because i loved him (dumb of me.). I did my best to point him in the right direction... he truly appreciated that. After a while I just became so emotionally drained. I couldn't do it anymore... I wanted to go on a break.... Guess what? that break never ended. After that he dated some trashy girl, it made me SOO SAD. I didn't go running back to him though... I still wanted to see if better even existed. I blocked him from my brain as best as i could.



My ex is a great person, who did stupid stupid things. I guess more than anything I wanted to help him have a better life then he had. I wanted him to be happy.



May 2008 I met my now fiance Christopher :) proof that better existed. Now to my ex, I'm the one he let slip away. It tears me up still, only because I know he's not happy and that he has gone deeper down the wrong path in life. I want him to have the best, but he still thinks it's me. I love Christopher more than anything, and I'm so blessed that I found him. It's like a breath of fresh air.

Even now, there is not a day that goes by that I don't pray my Ex finds something to live for besides drugs. He was a huge chunk of my childhood. It's hard to let something that had such an impact on you go... Only time healed me. Christopher saved me. Everything truly does happen for a reason.



Give yourself time, but just know that better has to exist. If you're ready, give this new guy your everything. It could turn out amazing... It did for me and Audrey at least.

Thanks sooo Much.

you always know what to say.

i loved talking to you girls.

i have really missed it.