Needs Advice On How To Support Her Marine

Hello All

I am a former Marine girlfriend, and by former i mean about 3 days ago we broke up. As of right now my marine is a reservist and we met a few months ago at school. At the moment I am in India studying for the semester and he graduates in May. Which I plan to be at since I will have just returned from India. After graduation his plan is to go to OSC, after that he believes that he will have a few months "off" and then go for more training and then possibly be deployed. From the moment I met this man I was swept off my feet he was funny, romantic and showed me what it was like to be really happy.

We talked about a week before we broke up about things that were bothering him and he was upset about being apart and what the future would hold and how hard that future was going to be. I told him and meant that when I got into this relationship I did it knowing who he was and what being a marine meant. I have and idea of what I should expect and know at the same time that reality won't be anything like I expect.  He is affraid and with good reason that something will happen if he is deployed and I will end up going to a funeral instead of going to pick him up from the airport. So his solution after a week of thinking about how to handle his fears and the fact that we are going to be apart for so long was to break up. He would rather me get over a heartbreak then losing him completely. I care so much for my marine and don't want to lose him, I also want to support him and do what he thinks will make him happy and if that means figuring out how to meand a broken heart then I guess it's what I have to do.

 

I'm not sure what I'm asking at this point all I know is that I need some guidence and when I came across this website it seemed like the perfect place to be asking for guidence. I read a few different posts and the respondes people gave and it seemed like a great support system worth looking into. At the moment I am very sad and upset, trying to be understanding because I see how hard this is for him. I am also trying to be hopeful that if I let him have his space and talk to him when he's ready and be a support system that maybe in time things will work out for the best.

 

Any advice would be wonderful

chiquitito chiquitito
22-25, F
7 Responses Feb 8, 2010

Even though my marine is no longer enlisted, dating these men are not like dating ordianry guys, especially ones who have been in combat. im learning all this real quickly given ive dated mine for a month , but if you feel your love is true, then support him to the fullest. best wishes.

Before my marine left for afghan i remember him saying how hard it was going to be, and to be honest we broke up for a little while. I continued to stay beside him and after a couple months of him seeing that i could handle both my life and my boyfriend being a marine and how much i cared about him, he realized that breaking up wasnt the right thing to do, it was just him trying keep me from hurting if something did happen to him. Its their way of showing us that they want us to be happy too, sometimes i think they forget that as hard as it is to be a girlfriend/fiance/wife of a marine its even harder to not have them at all. I wouldnt trade the life i have with my love right now for anything. hang in there it'll be okay :)

I agree I wouldn't trade Jim for the world even though it is hard I would be a mess without him

continue to support him and show him what a wonderful person and woman you are and he will realize that breaking up was not a good idea support him be there for him show him how special you are show him that you have what it takes to be one of the few one of the proud to be part of the silent ranks which are the wives fiancees and gf hang in there girl dont worry things will get better you will see show him your dedication your devotion and love and he will realize that you are an amazing woman and have what it takes to love a marine

He will come back to you. Just stay where you are and let him be the one to approach you.

I definitely agree with all the girls that have posted so far. Before my bf left for boot we dated but didn't make anything official, and we didnt write or anything while he was away. But when he came back we were right back where we were before. I actually had to convince him to just ask me out already because he didn't wanna 'put me through that' like so many of these boys seem to do. And he still questions whether it is the right thing for me every once in a while. lol. <br />
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dont worry hun, if its meant to be he'll coming running back eventually! :)

i agree with truckgrlhayusmc and pandabebop19. it always happens. after my honey came back from bootcamp we broke up. it didnt last. it only lasted a month. we couldnt stand not being a couple. they the guys all think the same thing, they think you wont feel the same if something happens to them if ya'll break up. bt as little deviant said jus continue to support him and stay strong. msg me if ya need ta tlk. btw im cassaundra

Just give him time and all will work out like it's meant to. Continue to support him and most importantly support yourself. He will see your dedication and loyalty and know you are who he wants. I'm sure no one wants to pass lonely as horrible as it sounds. I hope all works out well :]<br />
-Lexi