So.. We're On A "break"...

I know most of  you ladies don't know me, because I don't really post stories on here a lot.. I just read them.  So I guess I'll give you a short summary of me and Bryan.  He's leaving for boot camp in May, possibly March. We're both 18 and we'd been dating for like 15 1/2 months.  But the last few weeks had just felt weird for both of us.  Nothing felt right anymore.  It was the weirdest thing.  We've had our fair share of problems. But they got a lot worse over the last month.  We fought about every single little thing, and he would always turn it into being my fault, when it usually wasn't.  And when I would get so mad at him for blaming me I'd just stop texting him, and he didn't even try to get me to keep talking to him.  So, after a lot of thought I decided to bring up the idea of us going on a break.  Just to allow us both to clear our heads and get us both to remember what we love about each other.  Plus I needed him to realize that he couldn't just take me for granted, which I think he was doing.

I know that it seems kind of drastic what I did, but just staying together and trying to work it out wasn't working.  I would try and fix things and he would pretty much just sit there and not try.  I'm starting to wonder if all of this stuff has to do with him getting ready to leave.  I don't know if we're both just pushing each other away so it doesn't hurt as much when he goes.  I don't know.  I just have mixed feelings on the whole matter.  I still love him, but I'm not IN love with him anymore.  I need him to fight for me, and to make me fall back in love.  I don't know. Ugh.  Like it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, but at the same time I miss how him and I used to be.  When all we could think about was getting married in a few years, and starting a family and having a future together.  And we actually enjoyed each other's company instead of fighting all the time. It just sucks.  I hope he realizes what he lost and fights to get it back, because I'm done being the only one to fight for this relationship.  Sorry this was kinda all over the place but I really just needed to vent.   But I hope all of you ladies and your men are doing well and staying strong. Semper fi! :)

hisforlife183 hisforlife183
18-21, F
4 Responses Feb 12, 2010

Aud, I understand what you're saying.. but the thing is... I've already done that. Multiple times. I keep telling him I'm not going anywhere and how much I love him. And it always gets better for like a week. And then the same thing happens again. I just don't know what else to do anymore. And yes, I know he hasn't walked away yet.. but I think thats just because he wants the best of both worlds.. he wants me to be there for him, but at the same time he doesn't. So he just chooses to fight. So I guess we'll see. <br />
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And greem, yeah I agree. A relationship has to be a two way street. And I know that I can be a marine's girlfriend, I know I'm that strong. But not if he's just going to push me around, so he gets it his way all of the time. I guess we both need to fully commit to each other. And we're trying to talk things out but we just keep fighting.

Aw thank you girl! And yeah.. hopefully he'll figure it out soon. Its gonna stink to be single on valentines day though. Haha. But yeah, hopefully things work out for us soon (:

Im sorry hun. Me and trey went though breaks for like 2 years so stay strong and if you need to talk let me know :)

ahh! girl im sorry!! He will realize wether its today, tomorrow, or maybe a week or so!! I know what ya mean by loving but not being IN love anymore, its all about keeping the spark alive and its hard when your the only one working for the relationship. <br />
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I do think its partly because he is leaving so soon that he is starting to distance himself from you because Brandon did the same. Just stay strong girly and im always here if you wanna talk!!