Need Advice Please

He came back from boot & we had an AMAZING Valentine's Day. We don't see each other much considering I don't get the car a lot. Before boot, he used to call me and text me ALL the time, and he'd say the sweetest things to me. Like he was actually happy to to talk to me. Now, he's visiting all his friends, and I UNDERSTAND that he's busy. Yet, he can't call me even for 5 mintues to tell me where he's going or to say he loves me. After I text him FIRST, he only texts back 1, 2 or 3 words. Sometimes he texts first, but it's just short. Yesterday he just texted me "I love you." Then, "I love you more." I know he does, but he doesn't show it anymore.

Idk, it's just a big change from what he USED to do. He used to shower me with love per say, and now he barely texts. I know he loves me, but I just feel neglected. He doesn't even call. I've even asked him to, but he was busy at the time and never called later.

I just feel neglected. I was the one who was there for him during boot. I wrote him all those letters. I don't even know where the hell he is right now. He doesn't tell me anymore. I don't even ask for much. Just want to talk to him. :(

It's just weird cuz I know he loves me, yet he can't treat me like this. We only have a couple days til he has to go to North Carolina. He has all this free time to talk to me, yet he doesn't.

Oh dear, I bet a ton of you girls faced this dilemma or ur man acting "weird."

I'm just going to text him how I feel tonight at 1 am. He's always out somewhere. I know he's with his friends. OUR friends (guys).


jenny456 jenny456
7 Responses Feb 16, 2010

I texted him! He was out with some of our guy friends. I told him how it hurt me that he he never called or that his texts were so short & that he was ignoring me. He was kinda surprised I guess. He called me too. He did say that he was busy. BUT the good thing that came out of it was that he acted like his old self again! Like he said all the cute nicknames & sweet stuff again. However, I told him I was going to sleep. He kinda figured I was only going to sleep cuz I was upset, but w/e. He better text me tmrw. Soo the only thing I needed to do was to tell him he was hurting me. (btw, someone mentioned drinking. he doesn't drink anymore. he used to)

good luck!! hopefully he has something good to say :)

Thank you guys so much! I think it might be the part about being so close to me and idkkk....I plan to text him tonight. I just hope he understands how I feel. :( I KNOW he's busy meeting people, but really how hard is it to at least text me "good morning" or "good night" or to at least call me for 5 minutes to tell me where he's going. Ok, I'm nervous I'll keep you guys updated.

I have felt this way a few times. I've just learned to accept that his time is limited and it has to be split between me, his family, and his friends. It sucks that it goes that way, but its the reality of it. So just enjoy the time you do get with him and don't be too naggy.

txshuga is DEFF RIGHT! Ryan was sober MAYBE one day while he was here on leave. He drank every single day and i mean bad drinking. He had his dads truck bc he didnt want to drive his car here and have less time and one night he made the engine smoke bc he was racing. If i was with him i would have beat the **** out of him! then the 3rd to last night he was here I met him up at the park at 4am bc he was so drunk he didnt no what to do. I left my car at the park and took him home in his truck and stayed with him until the morning. (he snuck out that night and took his dads truck... dumb jflajsfljdslfa.) anyways Ryan NEVER drinks though that isn't the image i wanted to have of him but while he was here he just had no idea what else to do, everything he was so used to was gone and now he just got "thrown back into his old life" he didn't want to leave it again but he knew he had to so he just drank. :( it was hard but things got better. Just be expecting some things out of the ordinary but it will turn around.

The same thing happened to me girl. It isn't that he doesn't love you TRUST ME. it is just that he now knows what it feels like to be so close to you then be hundreds of miles away from you, and he is scared of doing it all over again. Whenever Ryan came home he spent EVERY DAY with someone new. Then he would call me so often. Then the last 2 nights he was here, he just started crying (which is VERY rare for him) and he kept saying sorry over and over and over again. I couldn't help but cry too. He said that he doesn't want to leave me and he only wants me and he knows that it is not only hard on him to be away from me but it is hard for me as well it is just he didn't know how to handle it when he was actually home. So he kept making plans. He still loves you and wants you, you just have to give him a little time to adjust. i hope everything gets better! he will come around be strong and if not then pull him aside ask him to come watch a movie and if he says no ask where he is and go to him, then just go walk or something and get the reason out of him.

There is the excuse that thinking about you or talking to you makes them sad, so they try to focus on other things. It sucks, but it'll happen more often than not. From what my marine has told me, everyone just gets drunk and acts dumb on their free time. I can't make you feel better cause no one but your marine really can. Let em know how your feeling, yall both have to work and sacrifice for this relationship.