My Heart Is In Afghanistan<3

Tyler will be deployed two weeks monday, he will be gone for thirteen months. My heart breaks the fact that he is away and i cant wait until he is in my arms again. We have been together about two years now and are supposed to get married next september. I became pregnant in december and two days ago lost the baby in a car accident. I havent told tyler yet and im afraid to tell him because i dont want it to break his heart while he is there, i also dont want to lie to him and when he returns expects me to be pregnant. The pain of everything is overwhelming yet im trying my best to be strong. At times i just want to break down and cry. His mom is absolutely amazing and loves me but at times i wonder if she really does. I just got off the phone with her and she asked if there was anything i wasnt telling her, which sometimes makes me wonder. I hear her talk about her other daughter in a law in a negative way and wonder if she talks about me in that way as well. Im not much talkative when im on the phone with her, which could be a problem but im not sure lately i just dont know what to hurting too much. Tyler called me this morning and said he would call again tonight, he asked how the baby was doing...ugh it makes him so happy. i hate this. i wish that this war could end and that he can return in my arms again and then everything could be amazing again.....

mirandaleigh12 mirandaleigh12
18-21, F
3 Responses Feb 28, 2010

I am so sorry to hear all of this.<br />
You and your Marine are in my prayers!<br />
Can I give you a little advice, just one thing...<br />
Tell him the truth and nothing but the truth.<br />
I understand he is at war and you don't want to lay another thing on his chest.<br />
But him dreaming of a child that is no longer there is very unfair.<br />
Explain to him what happened and make sure to let him know that as soon as he gets back you guys will try again.<br />
Good luck with everything and God Bless.<br />
<br />
PS, that song cry out to Jesus is outstanding!

^^^ great song. gets me thru the rough nights

i feel your pain with the feeling of the two faced mother in law. zack moms cant stand me. but yet she will hug me and tell me how much she loves me yet try and get zack to cheat on me with his x. just hang in there. i can always feel your pain on the lose of a baby. me and zack have been through that as well. it was right before he left for SC. if you need to talk at all you are more than welcome to message me i am on here alot these days passing the time.