6 Months Together Then 1 Year Deployment?

I met a fantastic man just three months ago, and he deploys in three months for his one year deployment. He will be sent as part of Obama's master plan which is really whatever McCrystal intends to do with them...but don't get me started on the politicians. I wish I could have met him on different terms, but you can't choose when love finds you. So here is our story in a nut shell... I only wish there was someone in my life who supports my decision to support my soldier. 

I am scared. I'm going into this trying to enjoy every last moment I have with him while I can. I'm trying to convince myself that I can do this and that trying to make it through this together is entirely possible and that 6 months with him is going to be enough to make it through 1 year without him... I'm scared. All the people in my life think I'm either crazy to think of staying or crazy to think of going.  Only one person thinks I should wait for him, and she only says that because she is military herself.  

I cry often when I read the news. I cry often when I so much as think of what he is going to face. I cry when he isn't around. I cry when I think of losing him, and I fear losing more than I ever though possible when he goes, but I know that in doing this, no matter where he goes or what he faces, he will have my love and my strength when he feels there is nothing left to fall back on.

I don't know if this is what is right for me. I don't know if I can make it and I know that I would feel even worse if I decided I couldn't while he was away. Anyone who has input from similar experiences would be VERY appreciated...

feverdream9302 feverdream9302
22-25, F
7 Responses Jan 12, 2010

Simple.. If you are doubting then it will not last. Im a solider deployed and I never have to wonder if my wife can make it through with me.. She's in the military, not because she joined but because she CHOOSE to be with a solider! Not ever girl is woman enough to be with a solider and it sounds like you aren't! That's being honest for you!

Seeing as we are about to have our three year anniversary you should rethink your line of thought. Uncertainty is not the same thing as doubt. Standing on the edge of the bungee platform asking yourself if you can is not truly what you are asking yourself. Of corse you CAN but do you have the courage to take the risk?

Hey, don't stress about this. If it is a strong relationship, it will work out. I'm a guy deployed to Afghanistan as part of the "Master Plan" as you call it and it sucks. Just support this guy as much as you can, we need it over here.<br />
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The deployment will be rough, no sugar-coating it. If you love him it will work. Don't doubt yourself.<br />
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I talk to my girlfriend daily, and think about her every moment of the day.

My husband got deployed yesterday for a yr to afghanistan Im 3 months pregnant an we have only been married a month but been together awhile. I'm in so much pain I miss him so much plus he is a infantry army sokldier so Im scared for him please keep him an us in ur thoughts an prayers now then its so worth staying with a soldier to many of them are scared to date because if the fear of getting let down thats why more of us need to stand up an do whats right fir these men who are protecting our freedom in the end the wait from every training an deployment makes ur love stronger when he gets home an puts his arms around you all you can think about was that the yr or week or month of pain that he was gone doesnt mean anything compared to how great this feels

where do I start? I was pretty much in the same boat as you. I met my boyfriend just a little over a month before he was deployed (a month ago) and when we first started talking I was like "what am I getting myself into? I am definitely not strong enough to date this guy when he is about to go to Afghanistan!" but I fell so fast for him and I knew I loved him and I wouldn't have it any other way. As hard as it has been I know this is going to make our relationship so much stronger. It doesn't matter how long you have been with him, if you truly love him, you will make it through no matter what. I often wish I had more pictures and memories to look back on while he's gone but that doesn't change anything. I love him and I will be right here waiting for him until the day he comes home. Hope this helped. Message me anytime if you need to talk!

Your welcome hun! As an army g/f you are just along for the ride lol and things in the army change EVERYDAY lol so it does seem like a confusing mess! but you get used to it and its a piece of cake. Oh and the army is very fast paced so our relationships have to be as well lol. Im 18 and engaged and planning my wedding right now lol i never thought i would be planning my wedding at 18 but i am and i wouldnt trade it for the world! My fingers are crossed for ya chick ;)

Thank you! I'm relieved to hear from someone who will understand. I might have to take you up on that offer someday. I know I have a difficult path ahead and I'm trying to stay positive with his deployment date nearing. I have three more months to be with him. We live in different cities so we can only see each other on weekends, but he tries so hard to make up for it. I have only known him for three months and things are moving so fast it feels like a whirl wind and I'm just along for the ride. In a normal relationship I would have taken things much slower so every time I get a grasp of the situation I get knocked out of balance again. We got past the initial baggage he was carrying and then he dropped the deployment on me a month later, and I'm freaked what could possibly come up next. .. I'll be crossing my fingers... wish me luck ladies..

Girl you came to the right place for advice and support. There are girls on here that have had every experience possible! If you love your soldier than any amount of time that you have been dating is enough to make it through a deployment. you just have to be strong and believe that you can do this. No one knows what its like to be an army girlfriend, fiancee or wife except for other army g/f fiancees and wives. The decision you have made to stay w/ him is a good one trust me! the army will make your relationship so much stronger and it will really help you appreciate each other more. Oh back to the amount of time you have been dating. there is a girl i met on here that they were just friends before he left and they started dating while he was stationed in germany and he is currently deployed. so she wasnt even dating him when he left and they have an extremely strong relationship! so dont give up and stay strong you can do this =) if you ever need anything you can talk to me or anyone else on this site =) just message me if you ever wanna talk.