Never Saw It Coming...will I Ever Let It Go?

I was offerred my first promotion with my current employer almost 4 years ago. I accepted and began training under my new supervisor, with whom I had no previous contact with in my entry-level position. His reputation was one of a highly sucessfull but very strict, detail oriented type of boss who was difficult to work for, but I was confident and determined to exceed his expectations. During the first week of our one-on-one training we got to know the basics of each others personal lives and situations, and discovered so many similarities in each other that we became quite friendly very early on. I almost didn't notice my anticipation to see and talk to him was growing more and more each day, and if I ever gave it a second thought I dismissed it just as quickly since he was married with children, I was engaged with one, and, well, he was my boss! While my brain denied the feelings growing inside me, my heart could only take so much until it burst with the realization I was falling in love with him! While I tried accepting my fate to only love him from a distance I couldn't help but notice his behavior towards me was changing and his flirtations and efforts to spend time with me were increasingly more obvious. Our affection for each other grew for months until we couldn't deny ourselves any longer...we gave in to our desires sparked the affair that's going on over four years now. So much has happened in that time, some good some bad, lives changed forever, and while I don't promote adultery or advertise my thoughts on extramarital affairs, I know without a doubt this man s the only one I've ever truely loved and I wouldn't trade one second of the time we've shared. Even though he will never belong to me, he will have my heart forever.
stillinluv stillinluv
31-35
4 Responses May 6, 2012

By the way...thanks for reading, hope I'm not babbling on & on TOO much...LOL!

Melsha-<br />
He is the only man I've truely loved...so far! I haven't given up on finding my next great love with someone I can build a life & family with. But my MM will always have a peice of my heart the same way my "teenage love" & my son's father will...those relationships changed my life & who I am & the experience will forever be a part of me.<br />
& to the EP User-<br />
I think his love for his children will superceed his love for anything or anyone else & he will do whatever is necessary to remain a constant, everyday presence in their lives. I admire & love him for that & I'll never ask him to jeapordize his relationship with them for my sake. Of course I dream & wish & pray he & I could be together, but I want him to be happy with his kids more than anything, even if it means I can't be with him. That's how I know this love is bigger than any other I've known...I genuinely want him to be happy no matter what the cost.

If he loves you he will eventually leave.

How can you live knowing that you can't be with the person you love? Dont you want to grow old together?