Not Sure I Am "the Other Woman"

I met my boyfriend years ago, we were married to other people. Neither of us were unhappy in our marriages. We were attracted to each other, but walked away. That was 6 years ago. We work for the same company but in diiferent areas of the country, we would occasionally into each other at work functions but never acted on our mutual attraction.

About 2 years ago i discovered my husband had been cheating on me our entire marriage and we split up. My boyfriends marriage had ended but he hadn't seperated because his ex kept asking to put off telling their kids for various reasons. I think he was really unhappy and didnt see a reason to leave until I came along. We met at a work function about a year ago and started talking. He ended up leaving her and I moved across country to lve with him.

The problem I have is I feel incredible guilt because of the timing, it appears that he left her to be with me. It also doesn't help that his ex tells everyone, including the kids that I am the reason their marriage ended. I know that his marriage was over, it was confirmed by his mother, who on the day I met her, thanked me for bringing her son back to her. (his ex didn't get along with his family and he had lost some contact with them)

How do I quit feeling guilty, I could've waited for them to be further along in their divorce. And why do I feel like a hypocrite? Am I really the other woman?
Jeanninem1965 Jeanninem1965
46-50, F
1 Response May 14, 2012

This will blow over. What she says has no meaning. The only meaning here is that you are with your boyfriend. I agree completely with shesback ;). Blaming others never looks good for the person doing it, remember that. Hold your head high and be proud of making your decision for yourself, and taking the action that makes you and him happy. Congratulations!