One Disadvantage Of Being Strong Is That People Think Its Ok To Hurt You.

We talked last night, i said I'm sorry for the mess i may have cause him, that i didn't mean to cause any trouble, that if he wants to end the relationship i'll be more willing and i'll make it easier for him. He said no, im not causing any trouble (yet, i guess), and that there's no way he's gonna end our affair no matter what it takes. He loves me and our daughter and he's gonna keep us.

I always make sure to let him know that I'm fine and I'll be fine without him, and I can take care of the baby. Well, I have a good job that pays the best compensation. My family is supportive, I have the best friends around, I have set of admirers too. I still imagine myself having a good life without him. But I knew it would be so painful at first, shaking him off will be the most difficult thing i could ever do, (if I could).

We're too far from each other yet i could feel his presence, he makes me smile, he brings joy to my life. He check on me always, we talk a lot of things, share everything. I wish he's all mine, but he's not and i make sure to not hope and to not lose self-respect.

For now, things are still manageable. I guess his wife must have heard about me already, but i am not feeling the fuss, my MM is i guess good at keeping both of us. If and when time comes that she confront me, I think i wont argue with her, i'll say sorry and that she takes care of her husband. I guess i'll take all the blame so that they can still move on with their marriage.

painkw3en painkw3en
31-35, F
3 Responses Jun 24, 2012

Yes you sound very positive, but when the time comes to break up; it's not going to be that easy once you're in love with a married man. They treat and cater to you so well that you're going to miss that part of it. Just still continue to have your own life with friends and family and other men to be balanced. I wish you luck!

I know it'll be very hard than I can ever imagine. Thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it.

Why keep putting yourself through this? Why should he get the best of both while you sit and wait for him? You are better than this! I know you love him, but if he were with you would you trust him? How much does he actually give you? A few hours? Don't wait until you are old and nobody wants you. Don't wait for your youth to be gone. Date other men. The best way to get over one is with another.

I like the points, you got me there. I am so much better compared to him, far better. It's just that with him, I feel loved and cared of. I guess our daughter put too much weight on my decision to get away. I came from a very conservative family and they doesn't know I'm his OW. They look up to me with so much pride and I'm lacking courage to disappoint them. That is why I'm taking time to finally tell them it's not working for the both of us, and that I don't want him for a husband. I can't tell them he's married. FYI, I am in this country who at the moment is the only country that doesn't approve of divorce. So I dont have any other choice but to run away, it's just that I have to take some time. Thank you, I appreciate your concern.

You sound very positive. Good luck. B-)

Yeah and I hope to stay positive. Sometimes it can be very consuming, but it help a lot when you're busy, you barely have time to entertain mushy feelings. I love him but when its time to call it over, i must be prepared.