Pizza Wasn't The Only Messy Triangle

A 17 year old pizza csr(me) meets a 22 year old pizza boy delivery driver(jay). Time: summer of 2009. To be fair he looks 19, with no creep qualities. Too bad he was already in a relationship with a 16yr old ex gymnist preppy mean girl, oh yeah whom I also worked with. I'll call her Em. Yeah, we happened to still be in highschool but that wasn't a fetish of his where he roams around the nearest highschool fishing for nearly legal bait. Anyway, we were both involved in our own seperate relationships. But the connection was so clearly there, my boss teased me about it. I was never a cheater but suddenly "homewrecker" became what seemed like an inevitable fear. 4 months of wonderful, clever, bonding conversations confirmed that yes I was falling for Jay. The office was our escape from everyone, like our own little world of inside jokes and desert island games. But we certainly left burning questions by my coworkers. There was a trio of girls at my place of work who seemed to have a sealed bond of friends like mean girls without the extreme hatred and desire to crumble the emotions of the weak. Jordan, my shift manager who was one of the two girls loved me. Desi, my favorite girl, who despite her loud personality and slight dislike of Jay, wound up to be my best friend. And of course the youngest and attention seeking "Em". They had suspicions they could not confirm or deny and I was happy. I may be scum, a homewrecker or simply a ***** for having an affair with Jay, we were both inlove, just in the wrong way. My intention was to never hurt Em or Mark but love is love, all I wanted in the world was Jay. suddenly May 2011 it all became a freakshow of we're-gonna- be-with-you-until-you-pick-one-of-us dilemas. This dragged on for 6 months until I quit my job there...that very week Em became pregnant. Jay didn't find out until January of this year. I thought a new year meant a fresh good start--no it was hell. A lonely hell. We had to breakup, I sunk deeper and deeper into a suicidal, depression. He confined in me as his new friend who longed to be with him. He talked about marriage, a happy life, a baby girl. His best friend offered a shoulder to cry on and apparently a secret romance he wished to share with me. I was single and devistated and yes I did end up having a regretably horrible night with his best friend that did end up coming out earlier this year. But now, Jay is set on marrying me and having a strictly platonic relationship with the mother of his child. He wants to spend the rest of his life with me and I KNOW he means it. The thing is Em is oblivious to this. He was supposed to stop talking to me in January... His best friends know he wants to marry me and he reminds me everytime. He wants his daughter to call me mom.
VioletCamellia VioletCamellia
18-21, F
1 Response Sep 21, 2012

there is a lot wrong with this. but the main thing is that baby! hell no should you ever ever ever let another woman's child call you mom. Because your not her mom! and that is disrespectful! no matter what! and very confusing to that baby! you need to step back look at it from that little girls view and ems. she is having a baby with this dude they will be in eachothers life forever. and if he is playing her this bad and this hard, to the mother of his child!!! what do you think he is capable of doing to you!

I mean he wants to share custody of her. I have seen first hand her threaten to not let him see the baby because he refused to kick me out of his life. which is understandable but it when she repeats the threat when he doesn't do something right is when it starts to bother me. I wish it wasn't so wrong and mean. He's just not happy with her. I stepped back when he felt like he needed to try and become a family with Em. That is very hard but I stuck to it. I never groveled or begged to give me a chance. If he was happy I'd be happy too. But even his mom wants him to be with someone who makes him happy, she can see it in his eyes clear as day that he isn't. I will never be his daughters mom but he knows if he wants to be with me and I him then I'm going to have to be ready to take responsibility too just like a mom.