Confussed

Never would I have imagined I b that girl. It's been 2 1/2 yrs since I started helping who I call my man deceive his women. We started out as just friends. More like he was a customer (regular) where I work. When he had heard that my boyfriend had treated me wrong n was no longer with me he ended up sending me flowers. The boyfriend n I split n I was pretty depressed. He got my nber from one of my friends n started texting me. Just as friends. He suggested id go to a game with him just to get out. Finally I agreed..from then on it started. I've known this guy for a while before all this. We had lots of good conversations.n have each other advice. He had told me he's been in his relationship for 15 yrs. recently n the last 3 yrs they have grown apart. Slept with each other mayb 3 xs a yr. he slept on the couch...now it's been over 2 yrs n I'm so confussed. It's like we r in a relationship. Him n the girl live in the same small town as I do n work. He always introduces me as his gf n we never hide. We go around anywhere we want so for a while it was easy to Just block out the fact he has n lives with a girl. Now I am totally in love with this man n he says he loves me too. I have broken up with him in the past but it didn't last. A lot of things have happened since we've been together we both helped each threw some tragedies in our short period of time together. My sister had passed then his brother passed n now his mother having cancer. These things have brought us so close. He says this year he needs to work on getting our life started. But don't u think he should've been doing this by now? I know we endured a lot of pain together but don't u think!? Or am I being selfish.?? I've giving him time. Mayb a lil too much? I just know I'm sick of it. I'm not blocking out that he has a gf. I'm done pretending I'm his only one. I have been nothing but faithful to this man that has a gf. I think it's time he steps up. I love him so much n I KNOW he is in love with me. But it's time I set this man free. Or should I say me free. It's do or die and I'm so afraid. He's my best
friend. I Know I can't even b his friend when I break up with him cuz that just doesn't work. I'll have to cut him outta my life completely n it just hurts so bad thinking bout it. But I know I can't go on in this kinda relationship. I deserve more than second. I mean there's so much to my story. he has no kids n he's not married. I do have a 6 yr old boy who has grown fond of this man. Idk I know what I have to do its just so hard. I need support. N mayb sum advice.
T1116 T1116
31-35, F
1 Response Jan 8, 2013

It sounds like you are at a crossroads. If he is not married but not taking action to break that off to be with you he knows he can have his cake & eat it too, unless you show him otherwise. NC is very very hard- but it will help you get answers. Remember that no action is a decision on his part.