Mm In Ema - Please Share

Hi all

I'd love to hear from the mm's who are struggling to figure out what they want. If they should leave their wives, if not - why? How many times they've tried and couldn't do it.

I'm trying to relate to my MM who's promised me a few times he'd be with me and just can't seem to hurdle it.

An Ep User An EP User
2 Responses Jan 14, 2013

Most don't leave mine did but I waited 8 years and they were hell,move on Hun it is not worth the hassle :(

This is an impossible thing to gage; unless you are in it. Ending a marriage is one of the most horrible things a person can go through and if your MM is wavering, chances are the pressure of the things may end up unraveling your relationship. My MM ended up leaving his wife to be with me and the guilt and pressure and enormity was too much for him to handle. He was not emotionally strong and/or mature enough to handle the consequences. The guilt and stress was too much and he ran. He ultimately saw me as the catalyst for his life unraveling - an unfortunate role for me to assume. These situations sadly, very rarely have a happy ending. It is probably best for you to let him go and sort things out independent of you.

i guess that's the part i struggle with. i don't want to end something that could turn out so great in the long run. i don't want him to think i don't love him. i love him more than anything in this world - but i give 100% and he doesn't and i don't know for sure if he ever will...i feel like i'm constantly protecting myself against him..HIM being the person i love the most in this world. it just doesn't make sense and i don't feel there's any right moves for either of us. it's very hard to walk away and i don't want to hurt him, but i wrote this crazy bi-polar note about how i will always love him and want to be with him but never trust him - he must be haven't heard back for a few days, but i work with him and will see him tomorrow - the hardest part, is that when i see him, i'll want to take it all back, and that's just not healthy...i guess i'll have to stick to my guns here

How did it go? If you do not ultimately trust him; that will never go away. Love and trust can be independent of each other. I remember my mm telling me time and time again that he felt like it would be impossible for me to trust him. I assured him many times that I did trust him, but looking back on it now, there was a part of me that did not. I started getting overly suspicious and paranoid about what other people were saying and what I thought he was saying and doing. There were a laundry list of things that broke us up, but I cannot deny this was a piece of it. With regards to mm, I know he cheated on his wife prior to me and I have come to find out he cheated on me as well. He is just one of those men that has a wandering eye and I don't think can ever be faithful. He loved me the best he could, given his emotional limitations. As much as I did love him, I now know neither one of us would have been happy long term. I would, ultimately, never want to be with a man that had a wandering eye and that in my gut always made me wonder about indiscretions. Keep us posted on your situation and stay strong.