What Have I Gotten Myself Into? (Temptation Continued....Again.)Months have gone by since that kiss. Many kisses have come after that. He bought a prepaid phone so he could text me privately. He would call every lunch break he had just to hear my voice. He bought me gifts and brought me lunch at work. Many secrets and lies have dragged themselves with it. Every time I leave the house to sneak out with him I feel a rush of guilt, then I see his face and his smile and it goes away.
I know I’m wrong for what I’m doing. So that’s why I finally told some one. My guy friend, he’ll understand. He’ll help me. He actually cares enough to get me to do the right thing. I texted him and told him almost everything, and he advised me to tell my parents. I will. Eventually.
Out of all my friends who I’ve told, (3) none of them asked how I felt, or how I was doing. They all just want to know the details or make me do the right thing. But if you stop for a minute, and ask me what I want, and how this whole thing made me feel. I’d tell you.
I texted the MM and told him that we need to end whatever this was. It’s been 6 months of the lies. And I couldn’t even look at myself. I was never this girl. I would never get between a love so sacred between a man and his wife. At least, I thought I wouldn’t. I was the “Other Woman”. I was his secret. I didn’t want be someone’s secret.
He texted back:
“I know, but my feelings for you have grown since that kiss. I don’t want to stop.”
I texted back:
“You do know that this is going to just blow up in our faces, right?”
“Do you believe that God has a one true love for you and you didn’t want to wait for them so you just decide to marry someone else? I think you’re my one true love.”
I turned off my phone and threw it across the room.
I do not want to wake up tomorrow. I don’t want to go to church anymore. I don’t want to see him. I don’t want to see her. I just want to rewind the clock and forget this whole thing ever happened. Why was this happening to me?
What Should I do?
itsmomojo 18-21 4 Responses 0 Jan 29, 2013