My guy comes home from the Bahamas tomorrow. And. Um. I signed up for an online dating service? What?

No serious plans. Just trying to live my life. We will see.
CCBatman120 CCBatman120
31-35, F
3 Responses Aug 16, 2014

I still think it's unfair towards your man to sign up for a dating site, even if you have "no serious plans".

Yeah I thought about that too. I do feel bad about it. I guess after two years I just get nervous that he'll never leave. I feel like I just need to remind myself that there are other nice people in the world and my guy isn't the "end all, be all". (Unless he is! Which I hope and pray he is!!!!!!!).

I guess him being in the Bahamas this week and not talking to me at all kinda made me sad. And made me think about life differently for a moment.

@CCBatmam120: I kinda understand what you mean and it's a good sign you feel bad about it in my opinion. Even if he's married to another woman, you shouldn't just do stuff behind his back.

@Katsstory: No reason to get angry at me, so please be calm.

Indeed, men who are married shouldn't be dating other women, just as women shouldn't date married men. But that is my opinion.

@sooty1977: That still seems unfair towards him, even if he cheats his wife. If you would go to a different guy when the MM is at his wife's, you'd be no different than him in my opinion. No offense meant.

It's a fine line, being on the dating website. I don't know how I feel about it yet. Sometimes I have so much faith in me and my MM that I think it's crazy and awful to be on it. And other times I think all the worst things and think I'm doing the right thing. All I know is that I am in control of what I do. Go out on a date, don't go out on a date, etc. and I won't do anything I'm uncomfortable with and I DEFINITELY WOULD NOT even hold the hand of someone besides my MM! He is my whole heart. I just feel the need to be a little cautious lately and remind myself I am number one. I am taking care of me

Aw Koko. I'm glad you were able to have that conversation. I think I'm going to need to figure out how to tell my mm. I think this has been good for me tho. I don't think I want anyone else.

Yeah, I suppose people could see it as a fine line. Well yes, you are in control, but wouldn't you say that in a relationship (if you have that with him, I dunno) honesty is number 1? Sure, he basically cheats on his wife, but should you do the same to him?

Just saying how I see it, it's not my business what you do, no offense meant.

So, if you DEFINITELY WOULD NOT even hold his hand but only your MM's, why are you on a dating site in the first place?

In a relationship, wouldn't neither be number 1? Both are equal y'know.

You've given me a lot to think about. I'm sick to my stomach today over everything. All I want is my MM but how will I ever know if he will be mine?

Thinking about things will lead to personal growth and allows you to learn more about yourself, including your feelings. :) I don't know the answer to that I'm afraid.

Only time it becomes unfair is when you are the one women in his life.
Whilst he goes home to his wife you do whatever you dam well like 😊

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I think you should go for it! Dating, meeting new people, etc. If some if the dates are horrible, at least you get some funny stories. I still talk about the one where the guy showed up looking like Eddie Money on the Travelocity commercial, high as a kite and ended up putting his fat, dirty fingers in my glass to grab an ice cube.

Ewwwwwww!!!!!! So gross!!! "She was shakin' oh oh ohhhh. Snapping her fingers..." Love Eddie money! Not for looks!

He used to be cute back in the day. And no, there was no shakin being done by me after that incident. Lol

I could tell you about the guy who I had NO connection with, nothing in common, etc... etc... I tried to pretend to be sick to leave and all the sudden he needed to tell me this damn story about bacon....yes BACON.....that had been left on the counter for two weeks....blah blah blah......Can I say.....I could not get out of the restaurant and in my car fast enough?! LoL

Oh no! Ugh. You know what? At least we got some things to laugh about after the dates from hell!

OMG telling me about your irresponsibility with meat products does NOT make me want you. Gross.

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All the other men on those sites have one problem....they aren't him. *sigh

So so so true!