It's easy and then it gets hard again.....

This weekend I was mad about it all but I was ok......I didn't cry, I didn't feel the need to text him, I didn't miss him.......I was mad.....but I was ok.

Then I saw him today......he came to my desk to say hi, to see how my weekend was.....we chatted. We were looking at something on my computer and he got very close and I could feel myself twitching......I just feel IT when he's close.....

Then he came back to get my work number because he'd have to call me from the road later that day and as I'm writing it down he starts massaging my shoulders......and there IT was again.

I try to act aloof.....I try to not let him in but he has his way.....he gets me there.....

I want to yell at him and tell him to go away and leave me alone.....but I can't.

But I sit here crying because I miss him when he chose her......she found out and he lied to make it less then it is.....he lied to make her forgive him......and while he's doing everything he can to get her to forgive him.....I'm forgotten and I don't matter....and it's that which breaks my heart tonight. It's picturing him saying it was a one time thing.......that it meant nothing that hurts so bad.
It meant nothing
I mean nothing
A guy that I am convinced is the one........
And I meant nothing.
I'm nothing
PrincessLolita PrincessLolita
31-35, F
2 Responses Aug 18, 2014

Hugssss big hugsss ...
How did u know he lied to her ??

He told me

Oh man r u serious ? :( i don't think i can handle that ...:( f)$&@@$$@@¥*%#

Nope. It hurts and he still just comes to my desk everyday to say hi and chat like everything is great.


1 More Response

He sounds just like my guy. No intentions of ever being with you yet continue toying with your heart for his own selfish needs to be met. Says it is all about your happiness (BS) when really it is all about "them." I feel for you girl. It is so dang hard!!!!