We got into a bit of a scream match yesterday. I have a chance, but it's a small one. I'm torn between being the happy girl that he fell in love with and wants to be with all the time and clawing his eyes out because I'm so frustrated. I think I've spoken my peace enough that he knows where I stand. Ball is in his court. If he loves me he will be with me. He needs to get a divorce for him- not me. I know we would be happy together. He just has to take back his man bits and take a leap of faith. I'm hoping when I meet the family member that knows about me I charm him enough to get him on my side. I'm not sure if he knows about MM's wife cheating on him and him walking in on it- if he does he can't be the W's biggest fan to begin with.

Me: "You make me miserable you know that right?"
Him: "You make me miserable!"
Me: "We would have the best life"
Him: "You have no idea how I think about that."
Me: "You're a coward."
Him: "I am a coward."
Me: "I'm not worth it."
Him: "You're worth more than you know!"
Him: "I love you please don't forget that."
Me: "Yeah, just not enough."
Him: "I'm on the side of the parkway. I ******* love you. I do!"
Me: "But you won't be with me! You would rather be miserable and make me feel like I can't breathe every day just so you can make everyone else happy!"
Him: "You make me happy. Kiss me tomorrow!"
Me: "No."
Him: "Ok. I love you."
Me: "I love you, too."

It's just the same ******* cycle every time.
lostanddistraught lostanddistraught
26-30, F
1 Response Aug 29, 2014

I think if I had reached the point you two were at (the fighting, etc) I would walk away and tell him to call me when he leaves her. I don't think I could do that every day (your conversation above). But it's different for everyone. What does your heart tell you to do?

I'm really torn. It's made even worse by the fact that we work together. I've been looking into other jobs because I know that cutting ties would be easier if I no longer saw him everyday. I love him so much- It's like the universe put him right in front of me and said, "this one! this one is it!" ... and then life in the form of a ten ton truck came and hit me. It's frustrating as hell because I know he wants the life we could have together, but he keeps telling me he doesn't know what he is going to do.

I know right!? Some sick cosmic joke. Here's your twin flame but you can't have him!!