He was a bit cold yesterday. Not as much active texting like usual. I gave him space and just let him be. It was still bothering me this morning so instead of trying to play cold too, I just asked him what was bothering him. He's already got a lot of personal issues, now that school started, he said he's even more overwhelmed. All I could do is provide him some encouragement and give him space to focus on his schoolwork. I've been asking him if we could spend sometime this weekend since it's a long weekend but I don't think that's happening. I'll just try to be more understanding... For now! Lol
ownomore ownomore
31-35, F
1 Response Aug 31, 2014

Not to be nasty but he's probably busy with his girlfriend. Men can only get away with paying little attention to their main relationship for certain periods of time as the girlfriend will notice, if she hasn't already. If his other relationship wasn't important to him at all he would have left her by now. Take my partner, he's been buying me alot of stuff lately but has been out alone alot. This sometimes says he's seeing someone else - the ow with him last 2-4 weeks on average but occasionally last for months. When they last for months he sets up one day a week to see em so isn't absent very often. I've watched my dad do this and I've watch my partner do it for years. I don't know how long you've been doing this for but some men put women into categoryies - women to have flings with and women to have a life with. It's quite ugly but it's how some men are. Maybe you would be better to find a man that isn't already attached so you no longer have these issues of being placed on the back burner.

Trust me. It's always in the back of my head that's what he's doing and sometimes I need to hear it again from someone's point of view to get a wake up call. I appreciate your feedback because I question myself how long I can continue doing this.

There are so many men out there and I'm sure most of them are good men out there looking for a single woman and you could quite easily have a less complicated relationship where you are their partner, if you want that of course. What makes you carry on with this situation?

We just clicked immediately and have so many things in common. We just connected on so many levels. I know there are single men out there. I did date and try with a single guy when we first took a break. I just didn't have the same connection with him. I know I shouldn't be with him but I just can't control the feelings I have for him.

Does he know you know about the other women? Does it bother you or do you just view yourself as the person he wants a life with and the rest is just casual flings and sex?

He knows I know about some of them, I'm sure there's others I don't know about. Not knowing is better in a way but that's not living in reality.

Sometimes it really bothers me and most of the time I don't think about it. I only think about it when I have to. When he goes off for a week or two. I know what he's doing and I know he's coming back. He lies, obviously.

One time he disappeared for a couple of weeks and came back saying "I have been alone, I haven't been with anyone else. Look at my phone, my face book." He turned his fb on and 30 seconds later was a message from a woman about 20miles away saying "how can you do thus to me. I thought we had something special. I let you in..." I laughed at him, clearly he just cleared his fb and phone - which I already knew, I had no interest in looking at his fb, he insisted and asked why he did "do this to her" he said "she lived too far away"

When it was a neighbour that bothered me, she's moving, thank god, I am still paranoid that he is still seeing her but again it's not really effecting me if he is.

I think I'm just used to it I guess. He is who he is, I either accept it or be without him. I accept it.

I think that's a very mature, realistic attitude. I suppose in the end, he always comes back to you. Thanks for your reply.

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