Any ladies feel like talking to me so I don't text him right now?? ☺️☺️
Missmetomorrow Missmetomorrow
26-30, F
3 Responses Sep 1, 2014

Isn't it sad that I've got so many genuine good friends that I could never ever tell about this..? :(

I think we are all in this boat. That's why we're on EP and not confiding in our real life friends.

I told my best friend because I thought she'd understand but I was wrong. We are still friends but it's not the same and I can tell she thinks if me differently now. It sucks but lesson learned, trust no one.

Yes I have two really close friends and then a lot of close family and friends and a lot of male friends .. But I'm sleeping with my on friends husband!! One of my closest friends (I did not plan this!!) and my other childhood best friend would never look at me the same I can't tell her but I wish I could

Nobody would trust me ever again

Ouch that is best mate understands so sorry your mate has changed x

Thanks, it's been hard but finding EP has helped.

Wow I'm not judging Hun I'm in an affair too.but your mates can you be normal with her?be careful..what's the saying don't **** on your own doorstep.

I don't know how I can be normal with her. I've asked my self that time and time again .. How the f can I do it, it almost scares me like I have two personalities

I've NEVER done something like this before. Nothing even close

I wasn't judging hun.Dont think I could handle knowing a lot about my OMs he going to leave her as it could turn nasty x

There's not a soul in the world I could talk to about my affair.

I am Sorry I have 2 friends that help me as much as i need .But you guys are going threw it with me thats why i am on here Thanks

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I need that too! Why don't you want to text him?

Because he's with his family today. My husband is working and he's with his wife and kids and in laws .. I can't text him just because I'm feeling insecure

Yeah I understand how that is. I'm very insecure when it comes my mm. I'm always second guessing every decision I make. It's hard when he is with his family because I don't want to bother him but I'd love to talk even for just a minute. I hate it but I usually wait for him to text me just because I worry too much.
Has he given you any reason to feel insecure or is it just a feeling you can't get over?

Nothing specific. They just seldom take pictures together but it's a family event and honestly she's posting new ones every hour.
I know that's so pathetic. I have told other people in the same position to ignore Facebook posts and stuff like that because it doesn't mean anything.. I just can't shake it this weekend like I normally can. His wife has really been working on herself this last few months, she looks amazing to top it off.. And good for her. I'm just being pathetic and jealous I guess.

He came here Friday before they left for the weekend and we had sex... Which we had barely seen each other the whole month before.. And I felt at the time he was trying to reassure me of his feelings .. But now I feel like he thought I would be less pissed off or bothered by all the things Id be seeing and hearing her post all weekend. I just with I was with him instead. And that's so far from reality.. I'm married with my own family I need to get my head on straight.

You're not pathetic, I think it's normal to feel jealous, especially when really care for someone.
I'm in the same position as you, married with my own family but sometimes we just can't help who we care for or who we want to be with.
When you say you need to get your head on straight, does that mean you think you should end it with your mm?

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What would you like to talk about?

I go crazy and over think everything. He told me exactly what he's thinking and how he feels just two days ago.. and I should just be secure in that but I am being swamped with social media posts by his wife showing happy family pictures .. I kind of feel he knew this would happen and that's why he came to see my Friday. I just want a distraction or someone to tell me blunt truths... I don't even know.

I totally avoid the whole topic of the W. Fortunately his W isn't all over his FB. What were these feelings he confessed?

He doesn't use social media he got rid of it about 6 months into the affair. It's her who posts none stop and usually it doesn't bother me.
He just told me he thinks I can do better than him, and that combined with the fear of the fallout if we got caught he's just been really insecure and nervous lately. He told me he hasn't changed his mind about wanting me he just needed to focus on his wife because she was very close to leaving him if he didn't.
Then he had sex with me.. After making me feel all special and good about myself..
Then all weekend she's been saying how much she loves her life and posting smiling pictures of them together. It's just getting to me this time.

That sounds so difficult to deal with. We have to consider that these affairs are also confusing to our AP's too. Think about all the mixed emotions we have. It almost sounds like he wants to push you away or he needs validation from you.

He gets validation from me that I want him.. Haha but I do not tell him any of my gushy feelings and we don't say I love you it's one of our rules. Yes. I know he's confused too.. And yes he pulls me real close for a month or two then pushes me away just as long.. Every time

This back and forth thing may just be something many of us have to get used to. I think my AP and I do it to each other all the time and it's not intentional at all. It's not like there's tons of surety in this. I would love to open up to him but I also don't feel like I should take that chance. When I feel like that is when I get distant for a bit and I think this is also his reaction.

Yes! I can deal with it fine usually. But every so often I have a rough week. I actually saw her and her kids tonight. They got home and maybe too personal but she asked me to cut their hair. She painted a different picture of their weekend.. Three big arguments and she was majorly hungover and grumpy the morning she had actually texted me that she loved ever bit of her life.. Then she said he told her she looked bad in her outfit. I can't imagine him saying that but in any case it's a different picture than I had in mind.

I don't wish bad for them! I want them to be happy. Both of them. Sometimes it's just painful to actually see it.

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