Forbidden Love With A Married Man
The original poem and my inspiration to alter and expand it to my situation was posted by CrazedTeenager on May 17th, 2008, a very talented insightful young lady.
Forbidden Love with a Married Man (Sorry for the format)
A forbidden love is what I have known, A cut so deep that it cannot be sewn.
I see the deep sadness in your eyes, The time is approaching to say our good byes.
I always knew it had to end this way, Yet I let you dance into my heart like a classical ballet.
I should have kept my feelings hidden, Since we both knew my love was forbidden.
If only I had destroyed this need, Crushed and killed this loving seed.
But I buried it deep and safe in my heart, Knowing I was a fool, but acting so smart.
So now everyday I cry, Because I know I have to say good bye.
I try to let go of my emotions with every tear, I find my feelings do not disappear.
Because life can be so unfair, I still hear your voice everywhere.
Its deep masculine inflections, In my mind is still perfection.
It stirs my mind and ignites a fire, My body trembles with remembered desire.
The way you touched me when we made love, Made me swear you were sent from heaven above.
The passion always crackled in the air, Two souls reaching out now left in despair.
I live in fear and anticipation, Of a time we are in the same location.
I know I can never turn you away, But how do I stop from begging you to stay.
There is something I got from all of this madness, A life time worth of joy and sadness.
All of these things have been put into motion, All because of my selfish loving devotion.
I did not know you would be the one, To change me so completely when we were done.
You never said you loved me, not a single time, So I guess we could say the fault is all mine.
Jealously haunts me and envy is there, Maybe they will chip away at how much I care.
Weekend are tolerable and holidays sad, But vacations kill me, almost driving me mad.
Intimate moments lying in bed, Erotic fantasy, torment my head.
Relaxing, reflecting and rejuvenating your life, All tender loving moments shared with your wife.
Who is this woman who holds my fate, She is the one you choose first, I was to late.
Men never leave, this much I know, It is always the woman who decides to stay or go.
I hate myself for these feelings I feel, None of them were suppose to be part of the deal.
I weigh the pain of staying or leaving, Knowing it is myself I am deceiving.
Two years have past and how many to go, Before I succeed in shattering my soul.
Is this relationship an illusion, made up in my mind, Waiting for the conclusion, where despair is all I'll find.
I know the day for "good bye" is there, Yet I will not rush to end our affair.