Heartbroken

I was seeing him for two and a half years. I had my suspicions that there were other women but nothing concrete. Well, Im not proud of it but I went in his email and found a reservation for a romantic night away. After a full day of him denying it, he finally admitted that it was true. I am so heartbroken. He is married, I am engaged and I don't want to be with him but it still hurts. I wasted two and a half years on this man and loved him and made myself available to him and I was just being used. He was able to without any regard for me, turn around and hook up with another woman and even take her away. Im shocked and hurt and I don't even know what to do to get me through this. I can't eat, I feel sick and I can't stop crying. The worst part is we work together and I have to still see him. I feel like I just want to die right now. I should have known. He was doing it to his wife with me, why wouldnt he do the same to me. I need to know that its gonna get better and this is the best thing for me. Im so heartbroken.

Babysteps Babysteps
26-30, F
1 Response Feb 11, 2010

It will get better!!! And trust me, you are better off without having anything to do with him! I know you have probably heard that a million times, but in the end, it's true. I kinda went through a similar situation...he was a guy i work with, and i thought we were getting along fine, and like you, i made myself available to him and he took advantage of it...he wasn't married, but he sure would take advantage of available female co-workers....and all the while acting innocent around me and avoiding me when mutual co-workers of whom he had questionable relations with would be around. He definitely took advantage of his position of power. But then, because of his own stupidity with his "bragging" about, co-workers and the like now look at him like he's an idiot, and have even made comments that were not so complementive...one was actually kind've funny, that i am almost afraid that when i see him again, i will have to hide a giggle! Don't get me wrong...i still think about him and wish things turned out differently...but that's just us women. For me, this experience has opened up my creative, satirical writing skills, and my friends have been enjoying reading about my little "tirades" regarding this experience! Listen to some empowering music! Do things for yourself and be selfish!!!! Trust me, i truly believe in karma and what goes around comes around....you obviously had your turn, and it will soon be his.....and you will be the one laughing, probably along with his wife (if she will even still be his wife) and the other woman as well...Good luck to you and take care.....