He May "recover" But I Am Afraid What Happens If He Doesn't

I finally stood up for myself yesterday. I made an ultimatum. Make a counseling appointment today, or I will not publicly support you in your christian ministry anymore. I can't handle the hypocrisy for another day.
A secret po*n addiction and spiritual ministry do not really go hand in hand. And I won't go along with it, pretending to be the supportive wife with the godly family.

Truth be told I wanted to leave him, not only to shake him up and force him to see how serious this is, but also to protect my own heart. He called the therapist and made an appointment. I think he wants to change. But I am still not sure if I can handle the process. Is it more noble to stick it out, stand by your man? Or is it foolish to imagine things will get better and that our marriage will be restored? What happens when he has a relapse?

I do love him. I can't decide if it takes more courage to stay or to leave.

kathpro kathpro
31-35, F
2 Responses Dec 6, 2012

Unfortunatly, even Christians can become sex addicts. I am a 62 year old sex addict and I have fought this addiction every day for over the past 48 years. I can't talk to other Christians because they have no idea of what it is like to be an addict. They have never been bullied by their families, classmates, or bosses at work. They don't suffer from post traumatic stress disorder like I do; nor do they suffer from multiple personality disorder like I do. I have 1 personality that call himself Derrick who loves *********** and I have to tell other people about him but I don't feel comfortable in talking about him face to face. Derrick came out when I was 2 years old and I was being sexually abused by my older brother and sister and her best friend. This went on until I was almost 7. I started getting erections when I was 7 and started ************ at least 4 times a day when I was 14. I had no idea about my p.t.s.d. and m.p.d. until I went to a therapist 5 years ago.

I think taking a stand is a very courageous step I too took that step its hard I know..but in the end I know 'i come first I have too stay healthy for my kids....