:/No one cares much anymore... and if people do then it certain it doesn't seem like it to me. I want someone to just talk to about stuff.. I'm pretty much on my own all the time now apart from obviously when I'm with my brother and my mum at home.. and occasionally when I'm with family or whoever. Even then though I feel completely alone. People seem to not really notice me much. I'm just that quiet girl in the corner. I wish just once someone would at least try to get to know me. No one bothers just because they see I'm shy and they think I won't say anything. I know I don't say a lot but I at least try to answer.
People just don't understand how hard it is sometimes. I wish people would stop going on at me to talk and to speak up. Obviously I don't want to be like this but I've been like this all my life. I can't just start speaking just like that.. and the more you pressure me to start talking the less likely I will anyway. Saying things like people are just going to take advantage of you and whatever aren't going to help. I know all that already. I'm not an idiot.
I know it probably seems like I'm blocking everyone out but I can't help it sometimes... but I wish just one person.. anyone.. tried and help me. Like really help. Not just keep telling me to talk.
I hate myself so much it's not even funny. Some days I just can't bare to get out of bed or look at myself in the mirror. Some days all I want to do is stay in bed and cry all day. I feel like a failure. I feel like I'm never going to get anywhere ever. I just want to give up on everything.