Asperger's And Social Phobia.

I too am tired of trying to be social as I am always being rejected. I have Asperger's and Social Phobia and have never been like other people. I can't read social cues or body language and can't connect or bond with people and feel uneasy and awkward in social situations and have trouble making friends. I want to have friends, be accepted, fit in and be liked but it never works out that way and there's always something about me that invites ridicule, teasing and bullying. I have always been ostracized and have never fit in. People always take what I say and do the wrong way,I offend people when it's not my intention and I mean well, and they reject me. It hurts trying to make friends but always being rejected and always having everyone hate me and think I'm weird. I had a very hard childhood and nothing has changed as an adult. I have always felt alone and prefer to keep to myself but it gets very lonely. I "socialize" better with people online than in person,I avoid crowds and don't "mingle", and due to being bullied, rejected and ostracized I have no self esteem and have pretty much given up on trying to inter-act and socialize with other people and am withdrawing into myself even more and the more traumas I endure my Social Phobia worsens and now it's gotten so bad that I can't even talk on the phone to strangers and I pretty much just stay in my house (except for church once a week) where I feel safe.
IMPogueMahone IMPogueMahone
46-50, F
2 Responses Sep 9, 2012

Have you tried groups for people with Asperger's Syndrome or looking for other people with AS online, then maybe meeting in person? You can meet some at I hang out there a lot and I love it.

Please be kind to yourself. You are valuable and unique. If you want involvement with others, try a service project where you're doing something. Standing around, talking about nonsense, is not for you. Volunteer at an animal shelter or work in a church ministry that takes care of others less fortunate. Try something like this maybe once or twice a month, however often you feel comfortable. Good luck!