Lost Faith In The Images Guys And People In General Reflect Out Into The World

I see most guys as con artists, fakes, users and game players.... most are just sons of 6itches... sons of sl uts... those god awful dogs who push their mongrel kids forward and who walk over everyone to get their kid to the top.

those guys who play act at being fathers and at almost everything they do. yeh what loser shiitters. I seen this sh it face today feeding its kid at the food court and just thought ... "can't you FFFFFFFf off out of a business domain with your cu nt mongrel brat kid??? you fat dried out stiff playing mommy. "  like I so can't stand the sight of you your out of juxtaposition here with all the cool office chicks and who would kill you with their mobile phone and heel of their shoe if they could... just to get your table and seat.

I just see a bigger picture when people present to me now.  I see what is not to be seen,  I see what they hide,  I see the omissions and the fabrications.

I am always seeing fakers and impostors play acting at life.


I see these young little **** and the 6itches who dress for prostitute corners and are too dumb to know they are selling "hooker" on their forehands

I really get annoyed at OLD POSH DOGS WITH THOSE WRINKLED OUT HAS BEEN HANDS AND RED LONG NAILS... they act like you are in their way in every aisle or check out... as if they are the only DOGS in this world to be serviced.... !!!!

the boring statement of "wow, we are in a relationship!" where its spew bag babies or those old DOGS ON HIGH gaggling out at the hen house...

or if its these so called "LIKE>>> yeh friends" .. who talk indirectly to you through their BF while on the mobile ... and listening to music in the other ear... and all they care about is looking great or who their next bon ks with...

old people... am I sick of deaf old people... and I am almost one myself.

how I hate guys ....   how I hate women.... dogs all dogs ... not one is worth a friend... let me tell you.. all women are lower than bed pans..


the best relationship I have is still with my cats.. because they ask nothing of me.  they love me even if I am angry , they have food and sit with me at the table and cuddle up in bed.  they know the routine I expect out of them and that is the best relationship I have.


all my friends are literally ar se hol es.... jerks .... they only ever want to kick me and bash me, use me

guys are just mental cases.  they want to be everything and nothing.  jerks.  they don't even know how to be polite or civil

its a spastic world we live in..... all the people are stupid spastic idiots. lead by money and power, sex, and primal instinct and no kindness.

so I do it back.. whatever people have done to me in the past they are gonna get back at them.


and I do not care.  yes I am lonely at times and poor,  but I choose this any day over abusive dogs like muzdog robinson that lezo wh ore drug dog.

and those spastic 6itches around Taxiride .... what a bunch of hooker s they were.

and people tell me its me who has to change??? but look at Sue dog!!!! the special SUE "champagne shi ts and bubbles Sue"... who insults you with a giggle and its suppose to polite chit chat.... when its just down right rude... and yet if I do it back she complains ... and I say in my head "Sweetheart. if ya gonna give it dog take it up the ar se your self face of old dogs f uck"
 
you can't say things for years to kids and adults and then expect them to take it forever... sue can't see that she is competing all the time with me for any man ... she has been doing this to me for years, expecting me to be a replica of her spastic stupid self... the things she has said to me over the years and general way of arrogance and distain with her noise up in the air (just like Roslyn) ... and all I have ever been is repectful to her... too respectful

I just don't like the woman... she is a fake ... she is so selfish and so unable to see there are other people more important than her.  she seems to think in her company ... all she does is talk about her self all the time.  she does not even know what she is talking about half the time she just has ADHD and like asPerges .... and autisum... she eats like a pig, she walks funny and she talks with a strange grip to her tongue ... and chin 


why has she always treated me and my sister like we are spastic and retarded... Bugsy and Louise and Patrick and Stephan did the same thing to me and my sister when we were little kids. always making fun of us... I know my sister tells me a lot that she knows they all think we are spastic for some reason.   they treat us like we are the ADHD little kiddies ... and the autism spastics with aspergers .... but I think they are... they just have an inability to see that life is a "me to you" experience and not a flat plastic slippery slide that always comes back to them. 

I literally can not say a thing that they don't try to throw it back at me and twist my words.  I can't get angry, I can't express sorrow or pain, I can't express grief or loss, or disappointment.  Sue seems to think I have no right to want a love of my own, a man who will defend my honour, or support me 

all my relatives see is them... they can't see anyone else has a need ... or want or desire...
 
I AM NOT PLASTIC AND I AM NOT A CARDBOARD CUT OUT WITH NO FEELS OR EMOTIONS OR NO SUBSTANCE ...

FOR GOD SAKE JUST LET ME BREATH AND LIVE.


my problems would less complicated if I had a nice campus atmostphere to go to ... like how I did years ago

I just wish the world would teach more love and care... to others ...


I read a sign at a church it said "a wise mother teachers her children how to love"... what does that mean? in this day and age?  what does love mean anymore?   "love just equals USER-FRIENDLY, INSTANT AND easy ACCESSIBLE NOW" STATUS and it means nothing but "here today gone tomarrow" this is the brave new world....  I show you love so you can abuse me and feel better about your self and I can go away with a great self debit.... !!!! great transaction of "love" ...   should I just stick to the self service mode then?  its the in thing and nothing is gonna change it... !!!!



czaristacrystals czaristacrystals
36-40, F
3 Responses May 22, 2012

most of the guys from my past now are long forgotten and out of date with who I am now.... and it can't go back to the way it was.. ever. people have to realise that. <br />
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmjQVoHrXe0<br />
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my father always told me "as you climb the ladder of success may you never find a friend on the way down" by dale carnegie and I know what he means ... but I have to wonder were they friends or just enemies in sheeps clothing...! why is everyone seems like an enemy to me anyway now. can it even change? I sure as hell don't want to know anyone from my past now.<br />
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRtvqT_wMeY&feature=related

or Joyce Poorter pulls her nazi style alienation of feelings therapy at me... and her nazi style self disassociation therapies on me ... like to her I have no right to a feeling over ron or bill abusing me... I have no right to grieve over werner death or the part of my childhood that was stolen from me by a pedo .... <br />
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no to joyce I have no right to an emotion at all.

like I am a weirdo that I felt upset and hurt and dirty and assaulted with ron poacher pushing things up my skirt at parties... but how many young 22 virgins would like a fat ugly violent wife bashing drunk doing that to them??? how many fathers would think "oh there is nothing wrong with it" or "your over reacting" ....<br />
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpiB9eNk3Bg<br />
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I mean its just I felt so imposed apon and how long was I supposed to put up with it from Bill from the age of 5 til 15 him molesting me every chance he got and then from 16 to 24 ron either spying on me, threatening me with violence or sexually mauling me, etc ... there were times I hid myself in my room and broke down and no one knew or cared. the times I picked my grandmother off the floor the times I looked after my sisters little boy when she was in hospital having shock treatment and night clubbing with drug addicts. and I never mattered to anyone. and all I got was my sister forcing me to go out with her yobbo male abusive sh itters ... who I didn't want to know... I wanted to have a boyfriend from college or university meet him in the library and study together... and not be forced to be just hide away without a job or identity of my own. my sisters friends had no right expecting to control me when there was a world out there I wanted to experience have my own friends.