For me, flattery is, well, FLATTERY. It's lots of big words intended to be complimentary, but lacking in real substance. My discomfort has a lot to do with the provider of the flattery, who in my experience seems to be somewhat insincere and perhaps well-intentioned, but nevertheless more annoying than encouraging. My mental reaction to flattery is to think "What kind of an idiot do you think I am, to fall for this nonsense?". Get real already!