A Not-so-successful-at-getting-hired-girl

I am 24 years old now.

 

Had I known any of this was coming,

I would have studied my a** off to get full scholarships to finish college.

and by that I mean, a VERY PROMISING college.

 

I was a little smart. Well, I guess not as smart,

but until I was about 9th grade,

I've never missed As in my report cards or tests.

 

When  I became sophomore of high school,

I realized not doing HW and not studying was kinda fun.

'cause you didn't really have to do anything.

My grades dropped a little lower. like As and Bs.

the later part of the semester my grades dropped a little more lower. Bs and Cs.

and then by the time I was in Junior year first semester,

my GPA was 2.1 and I was getting Cs.. and even some Fs.

 

That's when I realized it was about time for me to go to college,

and submit applications to tell them I'm going in to your school.

My grades and performance would surely WOW all schools, right?

How lame was I to drop myself like that at the most important stage of my life?

Anyway,

my dreams were to go to an Art School, and not some "geeky" school where they study meds or laws.

...or so I thought at that moment.

My grades were still good enough to go to an art school,

so I made my dream come true and got admitted into my dream school, Parsons School of Design.

and while I was in school,

I realized that you can't do art because you like it. You needed talent.

I was failing miserably.

I slept 1,2 hours a day working my a** off to pull off the assignments,

but I just didn't have the skills or talent.

Things got worse when my mom's business was doing poorly

and she couldn't afford my tuitions.

So I quit school on my second year with miserable grades

and $10,000 still in debt.

 

Until this, I have never had a job.

My mom was kind of protective, too, but I wasn't a social person to begin with.

When I quit school,

I worked in my mom's business for about two years

until things got really bad and she closed it down.

Then I was just sitting at home doing nothing for another 6 months

before I got myself together.

I was proud of my school and thought I deserved a good job, too,

but to think of it now, what am I to deserve it?

I didn't finish school, or got any good grades while I was there-

so why do I?

So I turned to think that any job, hourly or part time, would be appreciated if I got one

and looked for all possible jobs.

I got a cash job organizing and stocking inventory.

Never filed tax for it, never got paid enough either.

It was too harsh, too rough (I had to be inside a refridgerator all day)

so I got sick and quit the job after 3 months.

Then I went on looking for another job...

and good talented me, found another cash job. (I shouldn't have!!!!)

They were an insurance agency, and wanted to pay minimal tax,

so they are going to pay me cash,

and make me not exist in their agency.

After going to that place for another 6 months,

my mom decided she was going to relocate to another state to open her new business.

I said I won't go with her, but being I'm only 20,

and was meeting a non-satisfactory boyfriend,

my mom doubted and forced me to go with her.

and I was doing nothing but stay home for the next two years.

It was just such a secluded town,

that there weren't even jobs readily available that pay minimal...

I knew no one, didn't go to school, didn't work.

I almost got depression. Ugh.

 

Then my mom opened up her business..

and.. it went backrupt.

She's now relocated in yet another different state, just working.

 

As for me.............

Let's see here.My mom, after so many ups and downs...

is past due on her taxes since 2004.

I'm sure its piled up miserably.

I'm supposed to be listed under her name as a dependant.....

I'm 24, and if I decide to pay tax as an independant..

Well, I never had a job that paid tax for me.

I never had a "real" job.

Therefore... I could only put in my resume, part time temp job.

Resume looks terrible.

 

Then why don't I finish school, or at least go to school and study something, right?

and then get a better job?

I have a $10,000 debt waiting for me to be paid for a transcript.

Umm.. I think I need a job to pay that.

 

I was in a deadlock for so many years.

Need to finish school to get a job, but I need a job to finish school.

and I don't know how much I tortured myself

for being stupid, for being so weak,

I should've known this was coming.

I should've either studied hard to go to school with scholarships.

or I should've got better jobs to begin with.

I shouldn't have set back because I wasn't social and tried desperately to look for jobs.

 

Currently, I've applied about 50+ places.

and I don't pick and choose.

I applied for Petco and Dental assistant.

I'm just at the point where ANY job would be good.

Its better making a dollar a day than nothing, right?

 

Yesterday I got a phone call from a restaurant to come train as a server tomorrow.

and they are filing a tax for me :D

for the first time in my 24 years, an employer is filing tax for me!

Now I can at least make my own living,

try to save some money up for college,

even apply for FAFSA when I go to college!

Hopefully...........

 

I never knew when I was in high school,

that I'd be this overwhelmed and happy to be a restaurant server.

and also nervous and anxious that after training they'll tell me not to come anymore.

 

I feel so desperate and pitiful.

graycloud graycloud
22-25, F
3 Responses Mar 9, 2010

ugh these comments are SPAM! Someone can get a job as a web editor on this site. Anyway, please go back to Parsons and kick a$$ there. Never ever give up.

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