I Need Romance And Connection

I have been married for about a year and a half now. Before we got married we had broken up for about a month. I seriously don't know how or why we got back together. Maybe because I'm a caring person and sometimes I feel sorry for my husband since he is 12 years older than me and not married while all of his friends are. We got married, his way not my dream way. I agreed to it because we didn't have much money. All I wanted was a church but that wasn't happening with him. At the moment my concern is that I don't connect with him on the level of him being my husband. He essentially feels like my room mate and provider. He never initiates sex, I would be the one to do so, and he only lasts about 2 minutes and never cares about me in the process. It's all him. I sometimes feel like he thinks he is obliged to have sex with me when I ask. We only have sex maybe once every two months at that. I ask him and let him know that I need more intamicy in my life but then he complains that I am a sex addict. At which point he doesn't realize that I just want the connection. After sex we just go our separate ways. We never cuddle and we certainly never talk on a good day. I never know what's going on in his head. It was never like this with previous boyfriends. I want to know how he feels, and that he loves me. I come home and we watch tv in separate ends of the couch. He always thinks something is up with me. For example if I try and clean out the car, he thinks that I am hanging out with other people, specifically men. I just don't know how to deal with this situation as I do deeply care for this man. I love him to death I just need that connection. Maybe I thought he would change when we got married, I'm not exactly sure what I was thinking. I suggested marriage counselling but he just gets angry and says he doesn't need other people's help to fix his situations. We have no kids. I really wanted a family but I don't know if I can bring them into this type of situation. Besides he talks to his dogs more than he talks to me, and we would take forever getting pregnant at the rate we go with sex. My friends hate the guy and seriously try and set me up with their guy friends while I'm still married. I think it's rude that they try and do that but at the same time I desperately need the attention and I sometimes think about being with them because I know they would provide it. I just feel lonely and I don't want to cry myself to sleep at night anymore. I am a beautiful young woman that needs some attention. Yes, maybe I am needy but I just need someone to connect with. Please help me, I have no one to talk to because all of my friends hate him and they are biased. My family loves him as they are close to his age and I feel like if I Leave him I will be shunned. I am already the least favourite in the family as it is. :(
An Ep User An EP User
1 Response Jan 19, 2013

He is behaving this way, which means he is not being friends with you. You need to understand what gets him going. Guys are simple thinking and they get started with simple things. Find out what it is.

you ever try to chat with other guys online to help u feel better for you!