I Am Not Happy Anymore.

I used to be very ambitious person. Eagar to finish school, get a degree, jump out into the working world and move up, making good living and start a family.

But I've been depressed for about 5 years. I don't enjoy my job, I am constantly worried about paying bills so I don't even buy myself anything even if I do have some money. I freak out wondering where is my life going and seems like I am so caught up with money money money and wanting to have secure life without worrying about it. I know in my head money isn't everything in this world. And title in a company or moving up doens't necessarily mean you are happy. It's not like I am broke, have horrible family, I have a perfect man that I want to marry someday too.

I am not happy. I've been trying to find out why and wanting to fix this issue for longest time I've known. Going to work is so dreadful. I want to do something I would want to do but problem is, I don't know what. I am just so confused with myself and also dissapointed how did I get this far. From being so ambitious and hopeful in life to coping everyday with unhappiness in life. I know I need to appreciate things in life and I do also know I don't have the worst life compared to other people who is in difficult situations. I feel like this unhappiness is eating me alive inside and out. It's also making me get sick all the time.

People tell me to find hobbies, things to do, but what is that I love to do? What is that I want to do in life? I wish someone can just come to me and answer my questions for me. I've consider seeeing psychatrist or seeking some sort of help.

I can't stop crying. What is wrong with me?
jodyko jodyko
1 Response May 8, 2012

try different things - gym, painting, cycling, art, photography, baking, travelling, beauty courses etc and you'll find out what makes you happy out of those - it wont take long for a taste of what theyre like - one class of each .. you seem to have it easy compared to most people having a mna money etc - be grateful - youl be sorted in no time.