Please Get Me To My Happiness "my Husband"

I am 30 years old a mother of 3 two which are from a previous marriage that lasted nearly ten years of pure misery.I guessI brought those feelings into my new marriage Ive only been married for  18months my husband is 41 he is a great father specially to all of them he treats them the same in everyway thereisnt anything he wont do for these boys and i am greatful for that but he forgets about me i dont want to sounds selfish or anything but he thinks that the come first and yes at they do but when,where,how do i fit in i feel like i dont matter i have tried everyway possible to tell him i will admit its made me tell him things to hurt him just so he can feel what I feel but it dont work. he has made me feel like i cant please night right after sex i seen him on the computer watching a woman **********..i didnt say anything but it killed me inside i dont care what anyone says its wrong.sociaty has made it ok for me to lie and sneak **** thats cheating.would they want us to do that for another man no they wouldnt so why shouldnt we feel betrayed i feel like marriage is me,myhusband,and all these other woman its not fair..why cant he see that...its been 5 years since that happened but i have other situtations over time that has changed me and my feelings about my husband and men in general.i dont want to feel like this anymore but i will not stand for that either.......n29n
tammran29 tammran29
May 22, 2012