Ive been married for 35 yrs and i have endured 2 affairs (that im aware of) i feel like i have been beyond stupid, blind. I now wish i had left yrs ago when all this came about, when i was younger, prettier but i had 3 boys all under the age of 12. I had a good job working for state of Ca. But he was so remorsal. He begged n pleaded for me not to go or for me not to kick him out. He was perfect, always home and whenever he left the house it was with the boys or me. He worked very hard, giving me all his check weekly never questioning nothing. Well all that has changed hes worse then ever hes 62 yrs old now im 54 and he says he is going to go n come as he pleases. If he wants to go to sports bars n happy hr he will, n if i dont like it, then to bad. I have no one. There are days, weeks i go without talking to anyone outside the house. I lost my best friend of 16 yrs. a few months ago (not to death) she got upser with me ( another story) so now im all alone, he dosent take me anywhere, doesnt guve me money so i cant even put gas in my car to get out of here. I never pictured my life like this ever. Im lost, im beyond sad, hurt im tired of crying. Dont know y a grown women is so lost......
three4clarin three4clarin
56-60, F
2 Responses Aug 23, 2014

Stories like this scare the **** out of me. I am so beyond sad for you :( I'm 22 and my husband of 4 years is 23. We have two kids and I have endured 1 affair (that I know of) and numerous lies to the ***** club and Asian massage parlors. They never realize what a great thing they have.. I'm so sorry :(

There has to be some common ground somewhere. What started this attitude of his?

I have racked my brain, he git hurt at work 4 yrs. ago and at the beginning things were ok, but then money became super tight, he usually would b the one who would do anything for his fam. But this time it didnt happen that way. He refused to do anything. Ive had several surgeries on my hands and elbows but i would still do what needed to be done even if i was in pain, id take a motrin and i would bare through, he didnt he became a couch potatoe. He knows every talk show etc. things just kept getting worse. The names he would call me, i couldnt do anything right, im lazy. It got to the point i was afraid to put one foot in front if the other for fear it would start him yelling or calling me names. Im not exagerating every derogatory word out there for women i got called. I lived with this for 3 yrs and everyday it seemed to get worse. I started staying up in my room for days. Only coming down when he was gone. I started taking care of kids and it was helping us a lot, but then he stopped giving me money all together, nothing for the hse. pymt nothing for the bills or groceries so i finally asked him to leave. I was paying for everything so y did he have to b here, just another body taking up gas, water, light, food.....he left but that was to him the biggest slap in the face. Our youngest was 15 at the time, he wouldnt even give me $ for him. After that his anger was beyond. He told me he was sorry and if we got back tigether he would di better. Well i think he came back for revenge, hes making my life a living hell. I stopped taking care of kids so my income is very limited. I pay the bills still and he us suppose to pay the house. I just got notice we r 2 pymts behind and Sept, is right around the corner.