Married But In Love With Someone Else.

So here I am, 19 years old and married. I shouldn't have gotten married this young, but I was blindly in love (so I thought). I love my husband, I do. But I feel like there is something missing. That romantic spark, that real connection. But I'm not sure if I don't feel it because I'm in love with someone else. I knew my husband for 2 months before we married, so it's safe to say I didn't really know him and I was only 18. I've known the other guy for 6 years and I've likes him since we were kids, we just never really took it any further than having crushes on each other. Now I'm madly in love with him. I've tried to stop talking to him but I just can't. He's all I can think about and I want to be with him so badly. I had an affair with him and when we're together i just cant get enough of Him. We have a connection that i just dont feel with my husband but i dont know if km being blindsided because my feelings are so strong. I know the grass always seems greener. My husband is a great man though. But another thing is I feel like I don't know myself well enough. I got married at 18, I haven't had any time to be an adult and figure out my own life. I feel like I don't know who I am as an individual. My husband has been having the same feelings. I don't want to leave my marriage for someone else but because of what's best for me. I was thinking to possible do a trial seperation and move back to my home state for a while and try to figure things out. I just don't know what to do.
Tropicnp Tropicnp
18-21, F
3 Responses Feb 6, 2013

There is no perfect marriage out there and it is easy to envy what we can't have. There is no perfect person and sparks are to be created in marriage by commitment and investment of time, emotions and effort. Spontaneous sparks always fade away so if you keep chasing after that you would have had 10 marriages/relationships by the time you are 50!

I'm 25 now and I was 19 when I married my husband and here I am wishing I had waited. I say do what's best for you and good luck

Work on your marriage and do your best to be faithful. You have a good husband. You are 19, concentrate on getting an education. Cheating on your husband will leave you confused. Stop the affair and focus on how to improve your life. Give the marriage a chance.