I Had The Time If My Life

Amazingly, my husband and I shared an incredible holiday in Barbados.

I went with zero expectations, my guards down, and heart open to the experience...

During the day we rarely sat side by side... The children really made us run lol pool to ocean and back...but at night after they went to bed, we sat outside and actually talked....the first day regarding the flight, weather..nothing too serious. The second night about the day and what holidays were like prior to children lol, ..each day the conversations became more personal and finally the last few nights it was as if his heart opened up and poured out. I couldn't believe how emotional his choice of words were, how deep he got and the substance of his sentences...he connected with his honesty, his love and that's all I ever asked for. In the moment I appreciate it and valued his vulnerability.... It's everything that comes afterwards that will show me if this was him really opening up or him just letting the beer talk so to say. ( we were both sober the entire week- go figure lol) again, my expectations are realistic to the situation not with the momentum... I'm praying that him opening up like he did will allow him to tap into that side more often... The last 6 weeks have been better than the entire 4 years of marriage... I need to see and feel more before I can truly trust what we have.

I'm unhappy in marriage, but I can value and appreciate the good moments like a good cup of tea....and hopefully this just the beginning of our next chapter in this life together.
browneyeblues browneyeblues
31-35, F
Feb 7, 2013