Maybe I Am, I Don't Know

The principles resonate with me.  But there is no spirituality.  There is no networking unless you are on a committee that is trying to change the world.  The Green Sanctuary, the Welcoming Congregation, Habitat for Humanity, Social Justice, Religious Education...

In the meantime, I'm a member and I'm DYING inside and NOBODY CARES.  Where is the ministry to our own people who are struggling with the day to day?  Yes, you bet I care about gay marriage and immigration reform and reproductive choice and global climate change.  But when my kids have been throwing up for a week and I've just been diagnosed with diabetes and my husband doesn't want to have sex with me anymore...I need HELP and SUPPORT and I always thought church was where people got it.

If I pretended to be Presbyterian or Lutheran or even, heaven forbid, Catholic or Baptist...there'd be community.  There'd be people lining up to have coffee hour with me and talk about life and MY difficulties.  Yes, I want to fix the world.  But I'm struggling with spirituality and unless my answer is 'oh, yeah, obviously there is no god and those who believe are delusional' nobody wants to hear it.

My kids love our UU church but I'm finding it harder and harder to attend.  It's a church for rich atheists.  I wish I could just quit and try something else but my kids love it there so much. 

I'm not Christian.  I tried it, Jesus didn't answer my knock.  But I don't hate Christians or think they are intellectually less than anyone else (well, except maybe the hard-core 'Bible is the literal truth' ones).  I think I'd be pagan except it's too dangerous.

K626 K626
36-40, F
2 Responses Feb 19, 2010

Ouch. I feel you. One of the reasons why I joined a UU church was for support too. I'd have to say that I agree. There's a lack of community in my church too. My UU church is more amongst the Western U.S. Humanist leaning. <br />
It's difficult to break the ice and get real on people. I even joined the choir and the young adult group and there still isn't much of a sense of community. I'm told that classes, workshops and conferences tend to foster growth and bonding. <br />
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My church might be a bit larger than yours, I don't know, but I often see other "extra-curricular" activities, like the Adult Enrichment classes, parenting groups, yoga, drumming, summer camp, etc. For your spiritual growth, have you tried making an appointment to see the minister? <br />
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I respect your decision to not be pagan, but why is being a pagan dangerous?<br />
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InMyExperience: Your UU church uses their name on political flyers?~! Wow, that is way too far.

This made me sad because I have also discovered that UU churches can vary SO much in their population. By this I only mean... well... the first UU church I belonged to did in fact have a large Humanist population. There was also a large group of Pagans. Personally, I believe in nature and energy but not necessarily in spells (like wiccan's) or that there is nothing at all (like humanists). <br />
I haven't belonged to my "new" church very long but it seems very politically charged and I don't like that at all. It's one thing to support a candidate but when you start using the church name on flyers it goes just a little too far.<br />
I don't know where you live but some places actually have more than one UU church! (Amazing, I know, but ain't it great!) I really did like the R.E. Program too because it teaches kids and encourages them to come to their own conclusions, instead of brainwashing them into believing there is only one RIGHT way to think.