More Social Than My Good Old Journal

I have kept a journal as long as I have been able to write without much effort, and I still do. It's the best way for me to "discover myself", understand what I really think and have some stability in the self formed picture and opinion about myself. Still, it doesn't answer me no matter how many questions I ask, and no one knows about it.

I guess my original reason in joining ep was to gather all of my sides and characteristics to one place. That's why I have sexual experiences, ecperiences about likes and dislikes, actual experiences my past, things that just describe me and things that just seem fun.

I tried facebook as well, once upon a time. Somehow it didn't feel right to me. The point is to put your own name so people close to you can find out what you are doing and keep contact with you. That's exactly what I don't want. I felt like I had constantly keep eye on what I say, and what this or that person could think about it. In order to calm down and ramble on, I needed to find a place where people I know in real life don't find me.

I don't know how similar to me here is the person whom other see in real word, but for sure it's much more whinier. I depend on others as little as possible, but it doesn't mean I wouldn't sometimes feel the need to talk, to let others know what I'm thinking. Even if no one listens (or reads, as it is) it's still different than writing a journal. When I close that book I know it's for myself only, and nothing good would come out of it if someone were to find it. Instead of sharing, I feel like I'm locking that part away. Becoming more secretive when I should be more open.
Fearofsilence Fearofsilence
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 7, 2010

...Thanks! It shows a great way to use this site for something very meaningful (my opinion). I think the concept of a journal is a healthy one and any person has a right to keep things in the open and things hidden beneath the shade :)