"I Am Very Confused"

I have been away from going to church for many years now. In the last couple of years it has weighed heavy on my heart to go back. See the thing is I have never been in a relationship with anyone that was a Christain. I tend to end up with guys that will not step foot into a church. In turn I end up with barhoppers and womanizers. So about 6 mos ago I started praying to God to please send me a Christain man. Well I have found one and we have been talking and recently dating. He goes to a church where his ex girlfriend goes. They were together almost 4 years until she cheated on him with his best friend. Well he talks about her all the time and she still sits with him at church. He tells me he is over her but she still calls him! I understand he does not want to be mean to her but it seems to me he has not severed the ties with her. He wants me to go to church with him next Sunday. Now he says he has told her all about me and she knows we are seeing each other. He says if I show up to church with him he thinks that will make her accept that it is over between them.

 I am not a stupid person by any means and where there may be a little truth in her seeing us together and accepting that their relationship is over may be true I still feel he is doing this to make her jealous! So here is where I am confused. I am not a strong Christain and I desire a stronger relationship with God but what is he trying to tell me? Is this guy the one he has sent  me? How do I know? I thought he was now I don't know what to think! I am so confused! I feel like a lost Lamb about right now!

cmost cmost
36-40, F
4 Responses Jun 17, 2007

A Christian man if you want. Maybe a different one.

There is more to the story, i think if you go to church with him you might be able to figure it out. but i wouldnt take the relationship ant futher without knowin the whole truth...

if it were me? i'd pass on the church thing and make him handle it on his own. then, desiring a stronger relationship with God, i'd turn to the Bible and not a church. if you don't have a strong relationship with Him (which you don't have to go to church for - just read His written word as we are commanded) then i wouldn't put much stock in this guy being the 'answer' to your prayer ... just my humble opinion ... i'm kinda with p.i.p. on this one - the guys sounds a bit 'iffy'...

hmmmm, i have a few thoughts on this my friend.. either he doesn't have a backbone to tell her its over, or its really not over, i like things black and white, so if my new boyfriend was sitting with his ex who cheated with his FRIEND to boot and allowed her to sit there....doesn't make sense to me. and when she calls does he tell you what their talking about?? and WHY is she calling...should be no reason. sorry if i'm coming off harsh, but after the mental abuse my ex put me through, i don't have alot of patience for sketchy guys. i don't want to see you or any other girls repeatedly be taken advantage of. if i were you i'd sit him down and get some answers. sorry to be long winded lol, but it gets me fired up everytime.<br />
good luck and let me know how it goes