Very Disheartened

I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR ALMOST 30 YEARS. MY WIFE HAS MULTIPLE HEALTH PROBLEMS THAT HAVE REALLY WRECKED OUR RELATIONSHIP. WE HAVE BEEN IN SEPARATE BEDS FOR 5 YEARS, & AS FOR SEX, NOT SINCE DECEMBER ---  2000!! SHE STAYS AT HOME ALL DAY & DOES NOTHING BUT PLAY ON HER NINTENDO DS, NO HOUSEWORK, NO COOKING, NOTHING. IF I FORGET TO CALL HER AT A CERTAIN TIME WHILE I AM AT MY 55 HR A WEEK JOB, I AM THE ONE THAT GETS CUSSED OUT & BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING. I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING AROUND THE HOUSE, INCLUDING APOLOGIZING FOR MY VERY EXISTENCE. I WISH I COULD LEAVE, BUT I WOULD FEEL LIKE SUCH A CREEP, LEAVING A HADICAPPED WOMAN ALONE. I HAVE NO-ONE TO TALK TOO, NO MALE FRIENDS TO HANG OUT WITH OR DO ANY "GUY STUFF" WITH. I WOULD LOVE TO CHAT WITH A LADY WHO UNDERSTANDS HOW I FEEL. SORRY FOR THE LONG STORY, BUT THIS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO TELL MY STORY

dehan dehan
46-50, M
2 Responses Feb 25, 2009

I am sorry for your pain in some places there are what is called co dependent group. We get into toxic relationships ans see no way out. I too have problems and I always think things will get better. Maybe this is all there is do I want to be alone?

Wow you really have a good heart. I cannot believe that women act like that. It really shocks me. Do you know what I would give to be able to stay at home and cook, clean do my husbands laundry take care of business at home while my husband works? This would take alot of the burden off from his shoulders. <br />
Right now I work for a living and my husband expects me to. I have to basically provide financially for myself. My husband won't even take me on vacation because he is such a tight wad. He spends his money at the casino just about every other week. Then he gets mad at me because I helped out my girls financially. My ex-husband is a looser which hardly even paid child-support. So I have had to help my daughters out by putting them through school. My youngest daughter which is 23 lives with me now and I think it is getting to him. We have this arrangement because she is going to take her state board exams and until then she cannot afford an apt. He is pissed off at me because when his son turned 18 years of age I told him that he needed to go to college or get his own place. And I expected the same from my daughter but now my daughter is back home with a baby. His son bought his own house and moved out. He throws this in my face all the time. To start with girls don't have the opportunites that guys have as far is a job is concerned. His son makes very good money. My daughter was working as a waitress and no way could make ends meet. He is always comparing his kids with my kids. Sorry I guess I had to vent. I am still in shock about the way your wife treats you. I don't think you should feel guilty about leaving her when she is being so controlling.