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Coming To Terms

This single thought has plagued my mind for so many years now.

And to it I say: so what.

I am tired of all the expectations, of what I "should have been", or what I might have been. It's depressing and keeping me in a steel cage of sadness.

I am here and now. I live and breathe. Sure, I am absolutely wasting away years of education, certifications and training.

But... I can still stand out in the sun in the morning and let its warmth bathe my face and realize: I am not facing the intense pain of heartache or a lost loved one or child or abuse or any of the other things that the brave people in this world often face. 

I might not be moving through life as I thought I would ... but I am alive and I should be thankful for that, and I should try to enjoy what it has to offer.
Mirvanna Mirvanna 36-40, F 7 Responses Jun 5, 2011

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Ur thinking sounds OK to me. Don't over-do things and enjoy your moments in the sun. I am trying to do that too. Hard work has not worked out well for me in my life.

Sounds like 'soul misery' in my opinion. Were born and are forced into school to eventually "make the big bucks" and go off to post secondary. The thing is a lot of people are thinking of money before what feeds there soul. Choosing a career that has no personal reward other then money leaves your soul craving something else. Maybe your not choosing to use your education, certificates etc. because its no longer rewarding to you. Who cares if people judge you for not following the common path, you have the choice to do anything you want find what makes your soul happy and you've won :)

I think one of the things that can be a factor in depression is the thought "why did that happen to me", or other negative thoughts that just bring one's mood down; not to trivialise it because the cycle could be the result of so many things, and difficult to break; though I believe with practise it can be. Persistent, repeated practise over a long, long period.

You said it...right on! 8)

It has been my experience that the biggest regrets in life are not things I have done,but things I didn't do when I had the chance. Don't waste your life regretting what you can't change,but don't let the next opportunity pass you by. Grab life by the horns and body slam it!

Very true and profound thoughts. We aren't born with a roadmap for attaining happiness. Every choice we made or will make, can't be the right one. Every wrong can't be made right again. People let us down just as we let others down.. Some days are just plain yucky and are completely beyond our control to improve. Memories of special moments from our past, have a cloud of fantasy around them that we know make them better than they actually were at the time. Would we do things differently if we had the chance? Heck yeah. But each day is a new chance to do them differently!

I really enjoyed your thoughts on this. And it's so true how special memories have a "cloud". It is hard to convince yourself that perhaps they were not that great as you recall.

I get up every evening and go to a job I hate... To work with people I know don't like me and who If to be honest I don't care for in any small way.. I wish i could just drop it all and run away to china......live your life in whatever way makes you happy. need to take own advise (smile)

save up as much as you can, and go to china. do it, why not?