Meaningless

Its hard ..Really hard infact anything I or anybody has to say is muted by you experiences and your situation. From a stranger looking in? I would say there is sooo much to love about life, a happy marriage, a simple life, babies - happyness really. Who doesnt want to be happy?
If I were to answer, Id say if your life is designed to die, Id say take it as a challenge. What can you do with the time you have left? When I think about death I think of my siblings my family my goals and dreams.. and they make me angry. The will to struggle and fight wanes, pushing me down, till utter nothing becomes a bliss. Something I want. Its just not worth it! The wonder of what could happen if I live? Could things change? Could I make them?
You sound smart, really smart, probably a deep thinker. Some one with a voice and an amazing writer. I would love to know what your studying and all the reasons why. Theres excitement in what your doing not just distraction, again I dont fully know what going on probably never will. I hope things get easier to deal with thinking about suicide is one of the worst feelings in the world, but it means atleast the way I think and feel, that you care.

This is what keeps me going.

Humans are animals. An animal's goals are to keep it's species going. The only thing that we humans are doing different from other animals is that we try to better ourselves, our species.

The reason that keeps me going is my boyfriend (my bestfriend before hand), and he's made every day of my life worth living, and we've made plans so that our future is just as worth striving for.

This life is all a test, do not flunk it. do not cheat life will not be an easy test, but a greater good will be it's reward. now do yourself a favor and please stop thinking the way you do. there is reason in everything,

it is worth it to live to be happy to help to love to work to do everything thos things that you dont even like it matters becuse you want it suicid is one way out but its the only way out thats never coming back if you decide to kill yourself well you said that you think about your day try to think of your life insted if you kill yourself think about you family your friends the feeling they would get if you comited suicide thiking that they had something to do with your suicide how would they feel but if you want to die i dont say dont do it its your choise but i think you need to think more about it adn if you do that plz contact me and let me know how you feel after that if you still want to die or if you want to do all those things that makes you happy maybe you family your friends girlfriend go fishing i dont know but think more about it and let me know and remember its all worth it and it all matter

I have the exact same thoughts. Even if we choose to stay for any reason, what is the purpose? Consciousness is both a blessing and a curse. We are no different from any other living organism on this planet, except that we have the ability to question existence. That isn't to say other animals don't, but humans are equipped for life in a unique way... Sometimes I feel like as a collective whole, our development is still infantile. So far it seems the meaning to intelligent life is allowing everything to be a learning experience. But I can't help to question, for what? In relation to all that exists, we are less than a fraction of a blemish on the face of the universe(s). What really trips me out is wondering how in fact we came to be.. We are essentially what was a primordial mixture of Hydrogen and Helium that (speculatively) evolved for so long it began to ask these very questions. There could have been nothing, but here we are. Intense. I think that's what keeps me going most days. Wanting to find out. Perhaps subconsciously, that's the driving force for us all to continue in life.

Well, pass on marriage. I certainly did not find any meaning there.

I FEEL LIKE YOU THAT WE STRUGGLE FOR NO REASON. WE LIVE, WE BREATHE, WE DIE. I TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE WHEN I WAS 16, AND NOT A DAY GOES BY I WONDER IF THIS IS THE DAY TO DIE? THERE IS ONLY ONE THING IN MY LIFE THAT KEEPS ME GOING, MY 13 YEAR OLD SON. I THINK I CAN'T LET HIM GO THROUGH LIFE WITHOUT A MOTHER.NO MATTER HOW BAD IT GETS FOR ME, I THINK HOW WORSE IT WOULD BE FOR HIM IF I DID THIS.

I'm here to tell you that it's all BS, every bit of it. Don't think for 1 minute that having kids and all that is going to make you happy. It won't. Believe me. They may be cute but they grow up fast and then they hate you. Eventually you will lose everything that you love and you will be left with nothing..absolutely nothing. Don't even bother looking at religion b/c that's a lie too. Just have fun any way you can. That's all there is. There is no point to any of this. It's all just BS. You live and you die. What happens in between is pretty much a matter of just trying to find a little pleasure or peace somehow. So do whatever makes you feel good..just don't hurt anybody. I am 60 years old and I KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!

What is your reason that keeps you going? Is it worth it?



Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok , it's not the end.

I think everyone has a reason and a purpose, but I don't think everyone was meant to have a good life. I've been thinking a lot about it lately.



Some people just get lucky. They're born into loving families, get everything they need, and go on to have wonderful lives. For other people, they're screwed from the very beginning, and nothing they do or try to be happy ever works out.



I'm one of those people. I simply have really, really, really bad luck. I was raised being bullied and abused, both in and outside the home, I thought when I grew up, it would be my chance to have a family and be loved. My attempts to be loved led me from one abuser to the next. The bullying never stopped either, I've been cybermobbed for the better of at least 2 years now. I'm pretty sure the person behind it is one of my previous abusers and some girl he found.

I'm sure if they've found me here they're whooping it up, celebrating getting what they wanted.



I think it has to do with Karma. Not the silly *** for tat that most people think it is, but in a wider sense. Like why was I born into such a crappy life in the first place? Why did all those things happen?



I think it's for the lucky people, the sense of balance. If everyone could have love and a great life, there wouldn't be anything special about it, it wouldn't be worth anything. Somebody has to get the shaft. I do what I can to be happy with what I have, I'm not jealous of the lucky people, I still try to be a good person. Maybe next time around I'll be one of the lucky ones. For now, life is pretty predictable, and I don't see the point of waiting it out.



Not that I'm going to do anything, I just don't care anymore. I'm ready for it to be over. In a short while I'll be homeless, so I'm guessing it will happen then.

I had about the same feeling a few years ago. I felt so ******* useless and I understood that I hit rock bottom at exactly that moment.

I guess that irght now im at the point where my life goes like a roller coaster, right now im really low again.

Moms asked me one time if i do see any positive things in life at all. I cant really answer that because the past is holding me back.



So I basically have very little joy in life but I dont want to end it either?

I like you. You make sense

I do what I love to do, and I dont watch tv anymore....I do rent movies. I work on my vocation and love it, if you feel life is pointless, why dont you just volunteer to help people part time....at a shelter or something, at least that will feel worthwhile:)..updating my answer, i forgot to add, I do understand your thinking process, but, I dont feel that life is a struggle, as you do, not that bad, ive had some really tough ones too, I see it as a challenge to look forward to, and at times Ive deliberately created less in my life, so that it would quiet down a bit...either way...you need to be able to go through life in peace more and find enjoyment, I dont see anything in what you write, that you enjoy, and that makes me laugh out loud, is there anything like that? There should be, or hopefully you will find that:)>..It is worth it, dont give up...take a peek at the next day and try to make something or some time about your days just the way you like it!:)