My Life Is Easier Without A Car. Who Would Have Guessed That?

I now rent a car the few days that I work. Before that, I was working 50 plus hours and I constantly had anxiety attacks and was eating like there was going to be a food famine. I ate when I was bored at work. I often ate when I had to wait for clients who were usually late, confused about the meeting place(again) or forgot that we were supposed to meet for our session.
(It's really, Tuesday, I thought it was Wednesday?")

Other times, I would eat, when angry because I had to work with kids who didn't like me for being white--sorry, I'm white-- didn't like that I would not accept their reasons for stealing, poisoning, hitting and/or verbally abusing others, or just resistant to having to see someone to share their problems with.

Each day I was drained emotionally, and when I would come home I would need to tend to my son, and frankly, I was not into having to watch Sesame Street, color with my son, or play with his trains with him.

After work, I hated feeling that I often wanted to see if I could pawn him off to someone, like a sitter, so that I could get some peace so I could get rid of my anger. Because yes, I do get angry when I have to work with resilient teens. And, no, my emotional boundaries are not thick enough not to be bothered by verbal abuse each day. My job is to challenge kids by asking them to look at their problems and then work with them to help them reach their goals such as "decreasing anger issues." And lots of times I felt drained because all of my clients are at least 40 minutes away and it was always tiring to be driving into traffic for 40 plus minutes, work for three hours then drive to another client and then back into traffic.

Often it was worse, when the father of my son was home because he wanted me to help out with the cleaning, cooking and other things after work since in his mind and I quote, "All you ever do is play all day."

But ever since I lost my car I have had FREEDOM. I have lost 70% of my earnings, and now I only have a few clients and life has never been better in such a long time.

I got to go to the park today with my son!! I had time to read a few chapters in a book! I am not around hatred, anger and verbal abuse 50 plus hours a week.

And here is the crazy thing. I still like my job. I just never had a chance to relax after work. I didn't have days off--not even Sunday. I like not having a car payment. I don't mind too much that if I want to go to the park I have to walk there because it is my choice.

Less work, no car payment, and time with my kid.

I love it!