Confrontations!

When it for myself, I don't like confrontations. I can face them, when it's an attack against my friends or family. But, I pretty much try and avoid them, for myself. I don't like arguments, at all. And irl, shouting and anger causes great fear in me. I pretty much break down into tears and retreat. I shut down emotionally and curl up into a ball. :-/

For example... when I was in a hospital, many years ago. I tried to befriend a woman. Everyone was making fun of her, because she didn't wash and she smelled. They laughed and then walked away, leaving her and I in the hall. She looked so sad. So, I just took a breath... walked up to her smiling and began to talk to her, assuring that I asked my mother to bring me extra snacks and I would share with her. She roared, "Get the hell away from me, *****! I don't want to talk to you!" :-o

I ran to the other end of the hall, collapsed, and cried. The others who were teasing her, came back and saw me. They were concerned and asked me what was wrong. Through tears I said, "I was trying to be nice to her. And she just blew up at me! I don't know what I did wrong!" They just gave her dark glances and put a arm around me, saying that the woman was crazy and I shouldn't try to be her friend. That didn't help me much. I really didn't want to be friends or comforted by people who just made fun of someone... even though she hurt me, I just didn't want her to be hurt. Or be friends with the mean people who hurt her. :-(

So, I avoided her and everyone else. I stayed to myself, until I was released.

deleted deleted
26-30
2 Responses Feb 28, 2009

You might want to get rid of this.<br />
It's what I do, get rid of baggage like this.<br />
<br />
larry@newhop-health.ca

You might want to get rid of this.<br />
It's what I do, get rid of baggage like this.<br />
<br />
larry@newhop-health.ca