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Earth Day/Earth Week

I struggle with this theme, maybe because I think of myself as a hypocrite. I love the soil and grass and trees and long to once again stick my toes in unpolluted beach sand as foamy waves crash against my ankles. I grew up on a small dairy farm, where as a kid I raised and cared for animals, helped weed the garden, and harvested horse hay. My father grew soybeans and my grandfather milked cows. I couldn't wait to leave.

Many years later having lived in cities on both coasts, I find myself back on the east coast living once again in what has been referred to as the modern day Rome more than once. Working for a retailer who will remain nameless doing what I have done for 20+ years and trying to understand at this time in my life what's next.

The company in an attempt to put it's best foot forward published all the work we have done to reduce our carbon foot print, controlling our energy use in our stores, changing light bulbs and reducing our energy consumption of which I worked on. Reducing the packaging of our products, improving the shipping time etc.
Everyone made a "green commitment:" I took their recycling trash quiz and Aced it, Signed up to sponsor a farm and bought a 2.00 sugar cookie designed to look like the planet.
I then watched environmentalist Lynn Henning on Bill Mahar and became ashamed of myself, I work for a company who's entire profits are based on over consumption and over spending no matter of their "green efforts"
I buy too much, eat more than my fair share, and frankly could be the poster child for the fat, lazy couch potato american. In fact I'm probably worse my gifts be they indigo, crystal, starseed whichever you choose to label them make me more aware then the average sleep walking american, and yet I am tied to my possessions and everyday practices that add to the problem. I have a strong urge to purge the vast majority of my possessions and take a long hot shower to scrub the vast pollution I have helped to create from my life.
pack up my cat and hit the road. Change is coming be it wonderful or catastrophic, I have to start with me.
trand trand 46-50, F 1 Response Apr 22, 2012

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You are not an hypocrite! the proof is that you just posted real honest thoughts!