Every Day Is A Struggle

All we can do is keep on keeping on and try to do the best we can. We will fall, that's a given. But get up and try again! My friend from high school is bipolar and has a horrible time. Her hubby taunts her. I told her next time he starts in on her just ask him "You say I'm crazy. You say I'm dangerous. Yet you STILL want to make me mad!?!" I've always been the type of person to try and find the humor in tough situations. Sometimes it's hard, but its there somewhere! When someone you love kicks you when you're already down, they don't deserve to have you in their life. I'm thankful for sites like this so that we can share our stories and give each other the emotional support that we can't get elsewhere. Take care!

Man! My post disappeared!

The behavior of a person on speed does mimic mania. Please go to your appointment! It might be the one that gets you on the road to recovery. Usually, when a person is having a nervous breakdown they think everyone else is crazy and they are the only sane one. Yes, you can have mania and not know it. I pray you're doing better today! I'll check in more often to see how you are doing.

Thank you...I'll try to keep my appointment, but...I'll try...

I've been Bi-Polar most of my life so I truly understand where you are coming from. The best advice I can give to anyone who is fighting this disease is to only tackle one day at a time. Don't worry about tomorrow it not here yet! And don't fret about yesterday, it's already done and there is nothing you can do about it so forget it! Today is enough to be concerned with and sometimes it's too much. I've been there, I live it every day but don't give up!!! Find a good psychiatrist that really listens to you and stay on your meds no matter what. Every time you go off of them you get worse and it takes that much more to get on an even keel. Don't give up! You can do it, I believe in you!

Iaw the best psychiatrists in rome, italy and some of the most reccommended psychs in new york city...these people can;t even agree on what my illness is, let along finding a medication for it...I lost faith...you know, they used to give us lobotomies - techinically they still do, with a different name - and "cure" us...nowadays, if the meds don't work one has no resort...

TorticeShell, you are so right!!

EXACTLY!!! I've been heavily into exercise myself...usually when I'm experiencing hypomania or mania...never mind exercise...I MISS DOCTORS APPOINTMENTS!!!

Good luck!!!

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? I was diagnosed when I was in my mid-twenties and it just seemed so surreal. The first drug I was on was lithium and with that you have to watch everything you eat and drink. No extra salt, and this is weird but one soda(caffeine or whatever) counts as two because of the lithium. I gained so much weight and had to take thyroid medicine. I was on it for four years and didn't get much better until I changed meds. As far as the stigma that goes along with having a mental illness, I found that some people were more open minded than others. I think what makes it scary for most is the fear of the unknown. My doctor explained it to me in a way that made it easier for my family to understand. A diabetic has a chemical imbalance in the body that makes medication necessary for it to function properly. So does the brain. Why do people accept diabetics and not the mentally ill? Ignorance! Hollywood is to blame for a lot of that. I can't think of one movie I've seen that didn't involve the person being dangerous and untrustworthy. If a person doesn't take their meds, they CAN ( but not ALWAYS) be dangerous. They are usually "self medicating" with street drugs. But it is possible for a bipolar to become stable and live a normal life. You will have to make adjustments though. I try to avoid situations that stress me out, otherwise it feels like I can't form a single, complete thought. Over time, you'll learn from others and just from trial and error what helps you stay grounded and what turns you upside down. I found that it was best in some situations to let a person get to know who I am before I ever mentioned bipolar. Most didn't believe it and told me my doctor must be a quack. That helped my self confidence to know that they had no clue! I won't lie and tell you it's easy. My kids are the reason I try so hard to stay focused and to always see what I can do to make myself better. Hang in there and know that you're not alone. It's a scary road trying to find the right combination of meds. It took years for me. But, you can do it! If you need to talk, I'm here. The fact that you are researching and trying to learn more about being bipolar tells me that you will overcome your illness! :)

I'm 48 and I was diagnosed bipolar II at 28. Lithium made me sick...I had an outbreak of hashimotos hypothyroidsm. Much later I had regular hypothyroidism, then primary hyperparathyroidism...I was put on synthroid for the hypothyroidism...I know a woman who had hyperthyroidism and was allergic to syntroid. I was told that synthroid could cause mania, and it did, 4 months later. Nobody - 3 psychiatrists and my primary care physician told me that having mania didn't mean the problem was solved...I was allowed to deteriorate for 3 and a half years with hypomania. I don't notice hypomania...that's kind of the reason why I was seeing a psychiatrist once a month. No psychiatrist warned me but, especially, no primary care physician even hinted at a side effect, or asked me if I had some very telling symptoms. I went from hypomania to severe hypomania, when you can't sleep...the voice - your own voice - is so loud it keeps you up. I reported severe hypomania and a generalized itch to the physician I saw the most, my psychiatrist. He IGNORED the hypomania. told me the itch was NEUROLOGICAL and 2 months later removed my anti-mania medication...from then on I really went downhill. I developed mania, then severe mania...I went online and did some research. I found out that I was allergic to synthroid. I went off of it and everything improved...I never saw my psychiatrist or my primary care physician since...and those are just the mental problems...

Oh, yeah...the weight problem...well, I had anorexia nervosa from age 16 to 17. I got down to 67 pounds...the hospital sent me home to die...I was never cured from anorexia...I just switched to bulimia nervosa. With bulimia I got to 85 pounds...the thing is I have body dysmorphic....I can only see myself as FAT! My bulimia lasted 33 years. I took topiramate and it worked. Right now I weigh some...180 pounds, give or take...does it matter? No...I still see myself as fat...the weight started to go up with the psychotropic medications,but it didn't get too bad until I took topiramate and the bulimia stopped...

That's fantastic advice and you're right sometimes it take a long time to find the right combination of meds. Keep hanging in there and keep up the great advice.