Print
Mar 10th, 2009
533 Views
1 rec
4 Comments
O
k so here is my problem for anyone who cares to listen: I hear all these heartbreaking stories on EP; deaths of loved ones, abusive relationships, illnesses, broken families etc etc. Human suffering to the extreme. I can understand how these people would battle with depression; there has been so much sadness and burden in their lives.
Yet here I am, claiming I am depressed when nothing traumatic has happened to me in my life. From an outsiders view I would be labelled as one of the lucky ones. But I don't feel lucky, I feel like I am nothing. The uneventfulness and mundanity of my life is suffocating. Does anyone else have the same problem?
I've never had a boyfriend. Never had a close group of friends. I never get involved in anything or get excited about anything. I've never done anything risky or dangerous. I never initiate anything or make any major life decisions. I alternate between feeling extremely sad and suicidal at the thought of the meaninglessness and emptiness of my life and feeling nothing, feeling indifferent and numb. No past, no interests, no life affirming events, no future. Sometimes I am scared that I have no soul. That I am incapable of feeling love or being happy and comfortable and satisfied with the direction I am taking in life.
On really bad days I feel spaced out; I feel detached and removed from everyone and everything; nothing seems to have any relevance to me. Does anyone have any advice on how I can feel alive again?
 Comment (4)
 Share Your Story
 Flag
|
| Comment on this Story | |
  | Posted Mar 10th, 2009 at 6:41PM You might try some volunteer work. Nothing makes a person feel good than helping someone else. Let me know how you do.   |
 | Posted Mar 11th, 2009 at 3:46AM Thanks for your suggestion! I was thinking about getting involved in volunteer work as a way to feel like I'm doing something positive instead of being so consumed with my own problems. I've been lazy and forgotten about it but your comment has reawakened me to the possibility. I just need to find an organisation that is right for me..... |
 | Posted Mar 22nd, 2009 at 4:40PM I am from a village in England. Although I feel I have a few 'closer' friends... I was always (and continue to be) the one that everyone knows and 'loves' for my honesty(?) - and by that I just mean I do what I do when I do it and without much regard for anything but my needs(?) I have experienced mundane things but have blown them way out of proportion, why? boredom perhaps... I sometimes think if I was threw in at the deep end of a city and live like a slippery slicker - those shark people would be all suited and booted but - friendly to me out of pity and I'd hate that. I have been on medication, a therapists plastic seat and had support from my family, but the way I see it now - the stigma exists until I wake from feeling memory trap me into submission. Feeling is everything but it is also nothing. I hear u about every1 elses experiences on here, what with all the 'bad' drugs and 'bad' ppl and 'bad' diseases (physical legitimate ones and not the mental mockeries no one but the sufferer can/can't even see!) 1 good friend of mine - his mum is dead another good friend of mine - his mum and dad split my family - just fine... I'm adopted but thats never had to matter before. stay sane, go crazy, listen, learn, forget and then laugh. |
 | Posted Nov 5th, 2009 at 11:58AM I get this perfectly. Do you feel as if you don't even have a reason to be depressed and does that make you feel guilty and even worse? Nothing huge or horrific has ever happened in my life and yet I probably feel the same way you do, utterly finished, nothing left. If you ever need to talk, I'm here for you |
Share Your Comment
...then continue the discussion in the story's forum or, send this story to a friend
|
Polls for I Battle Depression and Anxiety
Here are some polls created by members of this group: There are no polls yet. Maybe you can create a poll yourself?See more polls for I Battle Depression and Anxiety, or create your own poll |
Questions & Answers for I Battle Depression and Anxiety
Here are a few Questions and Answers for I Battle Depression and Anxiety
| Battle Depression and Anxiety Open Questions |
| There are no open questions yet. Why not ask a question now? |
| Battle Depression and Anxiety Resolved Questions |
| Sort by: Most Recent | Popular |
21 answers - Posted 5 months ago |
8 answers - Posted 8 months ago |
See all question and answers for I Battle Depression and Anxiety
|
Forum & Chat Board for I Battle Depression and Anxiety
Here are popular forum topics for I Battle Depression and Anxiety See the Battle Depression and Anxiety forum to chat about these topics and more! |
|
Music, Song, Artist, Book and Movie Recommendations
|
|
Show this Story's Author Some Love
There's lots of ways to show you appreciated this person's story from the experience group, I Battle Depression and Anxiety. Send them a virtual gift, make a gesture, scribble on their whiteboard, or send them a private message. |
|
Translate this Story
Read this story in your own language
|
|
|||||||||||||||||||||
|
|||||||||||||||
Be a part of the biggest social experience on the web. Where who you are is more important than who you know. Share what matters the most and find others who just "get it."
Join now and get started in seconds, or learn more about Experience Project
Of course, we love to hear Your Story, whatever it happens to be. You can be yourself here!
|
|||||||||||||
