I Battle Depression
It has struck me recently that I am only displaying photo's of myself when I was younger! And I'm thinking, in horror and amusement (and faint disgust) - How vain is that!
Guess it's hitting me that looks and health are on the slippery slope. I look at the good looking, if not "hot" girl I was in my 20's (I'm modest too!) and sigh a deep sigh. It shouldn't matter. Looks. But packaging always helps and looking good, makes you feel good about yourself - (all that psychological stuff, etc etc ...)
When I was younger, I wasn't "vain" - that is to say, didn't make a huge effort to look good, I just did. I wasn't the type to preen and fuss. I'm feminine but tomboyish. Now I preen and fuss more to look only half as good as I did at half my age.
The younger attractive women I see around me, I don't have a problem with - no resentment. My thinking is that I was once like that, we all have our turn - it's the nature and order of things. But sometimes it's just hard to accept that life moves on so fast.
I don't like seeing this aging woman in the mirror. Lines on my face - laughter lines I can handle its the others - the ones that are screaming - Getting Old Love" that I don't like. Starting to find grey hairs for the first time. Health issues are starting to be that - issues - not things that I can push to the side.
Pretty sure I'm pre-menopausal. There are half a dozen other things I could mention.
Will stop moaning now. I know it's all stupid vanity. Guess I'm in vulnerable mode. Usually very positive person.
Will slink away now (apply numerous face creams and take Oil of Evening Primrose capsules) and remember that I have character and personality enough to face the world!
Mmmm, which side looks better ...........
Guess it's hitting me that looks and health are on the slippery slope. I look at the good looking, if not "hot" girl I was in my 20's (I'm modest too!) and sigh a deep sigh. It shouldn't matter. Looks. But packaging always helps and looking good, makes you feel good about yourself - (all that psychological stuff, etc etc ...)
When I was younger, I wasn't "vain" - that is to say, didn't make a huge effort to look good, I just did. I wasn't the type to preen and fuss. I'm feminine but tomboyish. Now I preen and fuss more to look only half as good as I did at half my age.
The younger attractive women I see around me, I don't have a problem with - no resentment. My thinking is that I was once like that, we all have our turn - it's the nature and order of things. But sometimes it's just hard to accept that life moves on so fast.
I don't like seeing this aging woman in the mirror. Lines on my face - laughter lines I can handle its the others - the ones that are screaming - Getting Old Love" that I don't like. Starting to find grey hairs for the first time. Health issues are starting to be that - issues - not things that I can push to the side.
Pretty sure I'm pre-menopausal. There are half a dozen other things I could mention.
Will stop moaning now. I know it's all stupid vanity. Guess I'm in vulnerable mode. Usually very positive person.
Will slink away now (apply numerous face creams and take Oil of Evening Primrose capsules) and remember that I have character and personality enough to face the world!
Mmmm, which side looks better ...........
27
responses