Struggling With Depression

I am a middle aged woman. Many changes in my life recently. I should be happy after making some positive changes. Why am I not happy? I have been battling depression for the past 2 years. I feel that my isolation has contributed to this. I have not worked in 3 years. Anxiety is making it difficult to work. Sometimes I feel that all I need is a good friend so that I do not feel so alone. I am not really good with people. I am shy and anxious a lot of the time. I feel that I am a kind person. Sometimes I just don't get it. I am working on my depression. Seeing a therapist 1 hour every 2 weeks. This is frustrating. It does not seem like enough. Does anyone want to communicate with me. I am new here, so I am not sure how this site works.

Cassandra Cassandra
51-55, F
3 Responses Mar 27, 2007

I've dealt with depression since I was 18 years old (I'm 31 now). It sounds like since you've only dealt with it for 2 years that it may be more of a situational case than chronic which is good b/c it's less cumbersome to recover from. I'm not trying to diminish what you experience at all. Depression is terrible to deal with in any form. Isolating is definitely something I've done a lot of and still do but I try to overcome that and be around people more. It is comforting when we are sad to be alone but only serves to make things worse. It's a negative feedback cycle as they call it. Being alone helps in the short term to deal with being sad but manages to keep you in that place (lonely). I've done quite a bit of reading and research on depression and bipolar disorder as well as my personal experiences so if you ever have any questions please send them my way. Take care.<br />
<br />
Chris

Everything you said is true of me also. I worked part time last summer but the anxiety made it difficult. I may work part time again this summer and see if I can make it easier for myself. I will just have to experiment on ways to feel better. It just seems like I cannot control my anxiety. I think it is stress burn out or system overload. I just hope I can mend my broken system somehow. I think that I could work if my boss realized and accepted the fact that I had anxiety so that they would realize that occassionally I struggle. Then I would not be expected to be perfect. Eventually, I may feel more comfortable. I have always been a great employee in the past so I guess I just need someone to give me a chance. It is just hard to find people that understand these feelings.

I battle depression also. I have for many years. I am employed but my depression has made working very difficult. I get into moods where I don't want to go to work and call in sick. I have been pretty good lately about going to work because I like my job that I have now. I have been diagnosed with panic anxiety disorder. When I get anxious or nervous I forget things at work, have a hard time concentrating and can start to feel like no one likes me. It is really a tough battle for all of us who suffer from depression. Have you thought about just trying to work somewhere part time?Maybe this would give you a chance to get out there but without all the pressure of a full time job. Whenever I have been unemployed it seems to make me feel more depressed. This is a great website and I think you will enjoy it. I have met some great people on here. I have found it to be very therapeutic for me and to be able to open up and share my feelings. There are a lot of really nice people here and the more you open up the better you will start to feel. Take care of yourself and I hope to get to know you better.