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Depression Go Away Already, Dude.

Depression, hmm some say no one can really get depressed or it's just a phase. Really? Well this so called "phase" has been with me my whole life.. I get so tired from feeling this way, every ******* day, every waking hour, and even my dreams are depressing.. How pathetic, I've been on antidepressants before, but they didn't help, so I stopped taking them. I've talked to psychiatrists and been in the psych ward. But, I still feel the way I do. I never get excited about anything, never amused, it just seems like I have nothing to look forward to.. And yes, yes I know I'm young still, but I do not want to keep on going if I'm gonna feel like this all the time, you know? I mean, it doesn't help that I literally have no one anymore. Everyone turned on me and ignore me, guess it's easier for them. I got kicked out of my house, my mom and step dad(hate him anyway) did not want me there and my dad didnt want me at his place either, my best friend didn't want me there so I asked my friend Blair who had passed away from letting all her pain get to her, so she sadly ended her life on me..that just killed me, that was so not expected, I still to this day can't let go of her, she was my love. I loved and still do love her so much it hurts..so that just made my ****** life dreadful, because man did I love that girl, she has my heart. Sorry for ranting on about her, off topic but whatever. So, I asked Blair's dad and girlfriend of I could stay with them till I find somewhere. Which they said yes cause I use to live at their house when Blair was still here, I grew up at that house. But, yeah. I just really feel like giving up, I mean what do I do? Where do I go? Who do I talk to? I have no one. Absolutely, no one. I just wish I had someone to talk to, ya know? Anyone.. I wish someone just understood me and what I'm feeling. Anyway, that's my story..thanks for reading.
DomsTuna11 DomsTuna11 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 8, 2012

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I have had depression myself for app. 5 years and can tell you it's an illness.



My friend Kathryn397 has a story "how to get up again" that I think you need to read and ponder the points of (I'm working to incorporate her ideas, amongst others, into my life)



I have a story "Looking to share warmth" that describes how I wish I could reach out and share a warm hug with girls like you...

Chronic depression is one the hardest to treat problems today. The evidence suggests it can be genetic or caused by something as simple as a blow to the head. You might be amazed at just how dramatic people's personalities can change from something as simple as a blow to the head. Anyway, if you've lived with this all your life it means you've probably got a serious handicap. Just like loosing an arm or leg or being born without one you have to deal with chronic depression. Its a real drag, but millions of people have lead productive lives and managed to find at least some measure of happiness that makes it all worthwhile.



Chronically depressed people just don't get as much pleasure out things as other people do. Some people might go out for ice cream to cheer themselves up, but it just doesn't work for others. When such people get sad its a real struggle to then pull themselves out of the hole because almost nothing cheers them up. The first thing to do then is to try and learn what makes you sad and avoid the worst triggers. Happiness and sorrow are relative terms so nobody else can do this for you. You have to figure out for yourself what causes the worst symptoms.

Depression is, ahum, an illness. A difficult one, but still.

Yes you're young, use that. I'm on AD's, they keep me going enough, but are not a cure. What's more, it tok about 2 years to find the right one and right dosage.



And, uhm, I do understand, and I kbow how you're feeling. You're not alone.

Thank you for taking your time to read and comment on my story. Means a lot. But, no I'm not in school, I dropped out junior year.

Are you still at school? if so find a school councilllor to chat with,also write down a list of things you want to do but keep them achieveable and then cross off them as you do them that way showing yourself and others you have accumplished something might also help to lift your depression.here if you need to chat!