Actually I Don't Know

I haven't felt right for years, at least. This year has been especially hard for me, I have moments of happiness and contentment every once in awhile but for the most part can't shake this feeling that the best years of my life are in the past.

I don't know if I am actually clinically depressed or if I just need an attitude readjustment. I do know that I have a very hard time having a positive opinion of myself and of those around me. I expect so much more from everyone, especially myself, and I get so disappointed in myself. I want things that are not realistically possible in any way and I just feel sad because my dreams and reality are so far removed from each other.

I am about to have my first counseling appointment ever and I have no idea why. What if I'm just being dramatic and there really is nothing wrong with me? How does one know that they need to be in counseling or therapy? If I can't talk to anyone in real life about it then how am I going to talk to a professional?
celandine celandine
22-25, F
Apr 13, 2007