I Want It All to End

After my dad died, my mom got remarried soon after.  I fought depression for about 2.5 years.  I would cry and cry every night and stay in my room.  Finally, I starved myself to feel physical pain to keep my mind off the emotional pain I was feeling.  I lost weight, but recently gained it back.  My friends and family think I look healthier, but I hate my body.  It causes me anxiety and stress and I can't get it off my mind.  I want to take control of something again.  I feel like I can never be happy.
monarch17 monarch17
18-21, F
1 Response Apr 18, 2007

It is temporary, you'll have to endure. I also felt I couldn't be happy ever but then what I did find pleasant things to do, things that I like to do, follow my interests no matter what people tell me. I began to be happy for myself, by myself, and with myself.